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Kendra never stopped to consider how her powers might seem to other people.  She never had to.  She wasn't that thoughtful.  It was hard enough to make simple choices like what to have for lunch.  Her mind was always exhausted no matter how long she slept.  She never really fell into deep sleep.  She could rest for 9 hours and wake up feeling like she never went to bed. "Hold that thought."  Kendra said and vanished. 

Kendra teleported away.  She reappeared in a subway station a few blocks from the mansion.  The roar of a passing subway blew her hair around as she stood dangerously close to the tracks.  Kendra didn't flinch, she came here sometimes at night to think.  This was her sanctuary away from the mansion.  Kendra put her cigarette out on  a steel support beam and flicked the but onto the tracks. All around her were random people going about their nights.  Not one of them suspected the invisible bombshell standing by the tracks. 

Kendra looked around the florescent subway.  It wasn't the most safe looking place, but it was quiet at night.  Most nights anyways. Reaching in her pocket she took out a case that had breathe mints in it.  Popping a few in her mouth she chewed them up.  Kendra sighed taking one last look at her secret escape, and teleported back into the mansion.  She reappeared in the living room.  She was just behind the couch now.  Kendra leaned over the couch, still pushing bits of mint around with her tongue.  "I'll try not'ta move round to much."  She said playfully. 

Kendra supposed she was a bit of a showoff at times.  It was in fact her sleep deprived nature that altered her personality at times.  Ordinarily Kendra was quite mousy and shy.  She acted tougher than she was with the way she dressed; the way she carried herself... Though, Kendra was just a quiet southern girl that struggled with the most basic of social interactions due to her shyness.  Other times Kendra was quite brash, cocky even.  Kendra could be a bit of a mischief maker and that's when she got herself into trouble.  When Kendra was truly tired she let herself go.  She fully embraced every wild impulse no matter how reckless and stupid.  It was as much a part of her personality as anything else and it wasn't something she had an on/off switch for. 

Kendra stood behind the couch now with a cheery smile.   She paused a moment when Allegra surprised her with a question.  Honestly it was a question no one had ever asked her.  She supposed no one really cared enough to ask, but the question stunned her a bit none the less.

So What's it like not to ever dream?

Kendra stood there mulling it over.  She crinkled her nose like a rabbit.  It was a nervous habit she did when she was flustered or thinking hard.  It was really hard to put into words.  Kendra sighed and hopped over the couch.  She slunk down in the seat beside Allegra and grabbed a couch pillow.  Covering her lap with the pillow she chewed on her lip, trying to figure the best way to answer.  "It's like your slowly loosing your mind." She said finally.  Her voice took on a thoughtful quiet tone. It was almost sad sounding.  "Minutes bleed into hours, hours into days, weeks, MONTHS! Your body feels tired, but your mind feels like it's crawling at the inside of it's skull begging for relief. Sometimes I feel like I might go completely bonkers if'n it weren't for all the coffee. I could sleep all night long and wake up dead tired.  I wouldn't wish'it on anyone honestly." 

Kendra was being truthful.  She wasn't crazy.  Her mind wasn't really deteriorating.  Truth was she felt things less in her dream walking state.  Pain was a little less painful. The cold was a little less chilling.  She felt less tired when she was walking around in a dream than she did when she was awake.  Kendra tossed the pillow at Allegra.  She was up for adventure. She was ready for.... Then Allegra cut her thoughts short and said she had to study.  Kendra frowned.  She was ready to leave the girl to her work when she changed her mind. 

A mischievous smile washed over the southern bell's pale features.  She had a few ideas.  They could sneak into the danger room and goof off. Kendra could get in there with a simple teleport and open the doors from the inside.  She was fairly certain that she could figure out how to run the simulation she had been through the danger room a few times.  Or they could head outside and try and make it through the hedge maze.  That sounded lest fun, but it was still on her bucket list. "Well.... Depends on what we're doing.  Have you ever been in the danger room?"  Kendra asked inquisitively.  Then it dawned on her she wasn't even sure if this girl had a mutation.  "Forgive me for askin, but you're a mutant right?"  She asked with genuine curiosity in her voice.

Kendra stood there a moment. She felt bad this poor girl's nerves seemed shot. Wasn't the first time.  There really was no good way to announce that an invisible person had entered the room without freaking someone out. Still, it could have been handled better. Kendra wasn't the type to haunt a place. She got into her share of mischief, but it was mostly harmless.

Up in her room her sleeping body rolled around. Soft moans spilled from her lips as she mumbled bits of the conversation she was having downstairs in the living room.  Standing in front of Allegra a ghostly presence Kendra felt the chill of the breeze. She had left the window open upstairs, and she wished she had closed it. She'd probably wake up with a cold that was just great.

She was still standing in front of the tv when Allegra put the book down.  Kendra watched her nervous movements.  "Relax hun, I'm not gone do nothing."  She laughed.  She wondered what this experience would have been like from the other perspective.  Kendra often wondered what it'd be like just to sleep.  She used to sleep.  That was a long time ago.  She couldn't honestly remember what a dream felt like, other than well.... This. 

Her shoulder's slumped and she felt her lips pulling downward in a frown.  She really rattled the poor thing.  She wanted to make it up to her somehow.  She wasn't sure how, but her mind started grinding away at something she could do.  Kendra could teleport.  When she was asleep she could anyways.  She exploded into a mist of pale creamy skin and fiery red hair.  Pink and red invisible hue lingered in the spot she just occupied until she reappeared on the other side of the room.  She reappeared in the doorway to the living room. 

Looking around the hallway she saw that they were pretty much the only ones awake.  They were at least the only ones downstairs for the moment.  Kendra turned to face Allegra when she inquired further about if she were dead or sleeping.  "I can't control it, when I sleep I just become this invisible girl.  Gets kinda lonely you could imgine.  Can't rightly just walk up and say hey how's it going?  You about jumped outta ya skin. So monstly I just sit quietly. I enjoy people's company without them knowing I'm there.  Wasn't sure if I was even gone say hello to you but..."  Kendra's voice trailed off.  "Would you be more comfortable if'n you could see me?" 

Kendra's hand slipped into the pocket of her hoody.  She felt the familiar edges of her cell phone lying inside.  Pulling out the phone and unlocking it her invisible face was cast in a pale glow that no one could see.  Kendra looked back up at Allegra.  "I could call the phone in ma'room.  I'd wake up and I could just come back down.  Officially meet'cha.  Not like sleepin's done me a whole heck'ava lotta good noways."  Kendra figured she'd be more comfortable with someone she could see and touch. 

Kendra could reach out and touch her now.  Allegra would be able to feel her soft hand on her shoulder, though it might not be the best for her frayed nerves.  Kendra pulled out a cigarette and lit it up in the doorway across the room. The sound of the lighter flicking cut through the silence between them.  The smell of smoke filled the air as Kendra blew the smoke out into the other room.  She was leaning on the doorframe.  Her free hand slunk back into her pocket still holding her phone.  "If'n you'd like that, I could show you what I like to do for fun. Much easier to show you in person." 

Making it back to her feet Kendra saw the simulations crashing. She thought she had broken it somehow. In all honesty they had beaten it. Kendra smiled lightly despite the pain in her ribs. She was standing on her own two feet though so that was good. Kendra had survived the danger room twice now. That had to say something right? She didn't know if it was a point of pride, or stupidity. She did want to brag about it though.

When Juliette asked her if she wanted to get coffee it was hard to turn her down. Kendra lived on coffee. It was helpful to keep her mind sharp and focused when she was running on little rest. For now however, she decided she better go see Docprofessor and get patched up.  She was there so often, he might actually start charging her rent.

"No, thank I'ma have to take a hardpass on that. Ma'ribs feel like someone used'em for a trampoline." Every word out of Kendra's mouth was followed by a heavy gasping breathe, but she was smiling. She was putting on a brave face despite how she felt. She'd live. "Thank I'ma just poof down there. The danger room lives up to it's name huh?"

Teleporting over to her body she produced some smelling salts.  She snapped them under her nose and woke up almost instantly.  Her astral body disappeared and now her ribs were really killing her.  Pushing herself to her feet she limped to the door.  She gave a half hearted wave to Juliette.  It just hurt to lift her arm that was all.  Mission successful. Now it was time to rest and recover. 

The city wasn't so bad during the day. Kendra looked around and saw people moving from here or there as the cab made it's way to the restaurant. Everything was normal. Everything was... Calm. She didn't have the panic attack that she had a few nights ago when she ventured out on her own. It might've also been Xavai's calming presense, but Kendra felt ok being in the city.

A few nights ago she tried to come out at two in the morning and she nearly collapsed in the street from a panic attack. The sound of her attacker's gunshot still rang slightly in her ears as Kendra shook off the faded memory. She tucked her haunted past in her back pocket where it belonged and tried to smile at Xavia as her mind wandered to things that kept her up most nights. "Should be great!" She said trying to sound as cheerful as possible.

When they made it inside the restaurant Kendra quietly sat down.  Kendra didn't get out much. It took someone else dragging her away from the mansion to get her out at all lately. It used to be when she dream walked she loved to travel. She would spend her nights walking around and exploring EVERYTHING. But New York was different. New York was staggeringly frightening.  Especially since she had been shot.

Xavia said that she wanted to be there for her. To help her wade through the minefield of fragmented pain. She would take Xavia's hand and feel much better knowing that she was there beside her. Just knowing that she wasn't facing it alone was enough. She had told her that she was ok, but in her heart she knew that wasn't the truth. Part of her still struggled with it. She couldn't even go out into the city at night while invisible! Kendra was afraid. It was going to take time, and understanding.  Those were two things Kendra was not very good at. 

Kendra was a chameleon.  She hid in plain sight.  She took her pain and her anguish and she locked it away behind dazzling big brown eyes.  She kept it cloaked by a beautiful smile and long lashes.  Kendra was a tight rope walker.  She balanced between the chaos and the norm and she was doing her best not to slip.  The two shared idle chit chat about how they've been, what they have been up to.  That was fine, but it wasn't meaningful.  It wasn't deep.  Kendra bit her lip a little.  She was about to say something.  She was about to open up to her friend and pour her heart out, but before she could.... She heard Xavia's stomach growl. 

Kendra looked down at the growling stomach.  She tried not to laugh a little.  Not even born yet and the kid was calling the shots.  He .... Or she was going to be a little hellion.  A major handful.  That actually did make Kendra smile, she knew that Xavia was going to be great at it.  She could handle so much, no way she was going to falter. Kendra reached across the table and pulled Xavia's hand into her own.  "Maybe we should order." She said softly.  After the food arrives.. She thought.  Then i'll tell her how I've been struggling.

Kendra found herself standing out on the streets of New York. All around her were sights and sounds, smells and people. That was one thing she had to get used to. The liveliness of New York even in the early mornings.  It was about 2 in the and the city was very much alive. There were street vendors and people hailing cabs.  Kendra found herself staring at bright lights and snapped a photo with her camera. She was invisible and so was her beloved camera. Somewhere miles away Kendra was sleeping quietly in her warm bed.

She felt the brisk breeze kiss her skin. Even in her astral form it made her shiver as her camera's lens shuttered a few more pictures. She took a picture of steam coming out of a grate. It looked like the city itself was breathing.  It was. The city was alive. It took on it's own persona as much as any man woman or child within it. The city was dark. Kendra had come to know New York as something she both loved and hated in her short time here.  The city was sick.  It was a festering rotting thing with crime as its toxins.  It was flashy and slick and attracted new victims to visit daily. 

New York was violence.  It was sickeningly violent.  The crime here was out of control.  Almost every night Kendra had come out she had witnessed at least one random act of violence.  It was even more scary now since she had been shot.  Kendra seemed a bit sheepish as she stood on the sidewalk.  Suddenly the things that appeared in front of the lens of her camera was not things she wanted to capture.  Rather, they were things she wanted to ignore. 

Kendra saw across the way two guys beating the holy hell out of some poor guy in the alley.  Two floors up just beside the fire escape there was a man yelling at his wife.  There were cars honking at each other.  People cursing at each other through open windows.  Kendra watched as two kids ran out of a store and the store owner chasing them out on to the sidewalk before giving up his pursuit.  Somewhere the scream of police sirens wailed like a banshee.  She spotted the red and blue flashing lights darting around a corner. 

Kendra would have tried to help.  She would have stepped in and tried to plug these leaks in the city that was slowly bleeding.  She would have stopped one leak only to watch three more spring up in it's place.  That was before she got shot.  Kendra wasn't out here to vigilante. She was out here to take pictures, to ease her troubled mind. All she found was more trouble.  She watched as humanity slowly and methodically tore itself apart in front of her very eyes.  There were places trying to do good for the world.  The mansion was trying to put good into the world.  Trying to stop the violence by training people willing to stand up to it, but New York bled to fiercely for such a simple band aid to fix.

Kendra began to breathe more rapidly. Her eyes darted around the sights and sounds of New York that were now like an assault on her senses.  Suddenly the sounds were much louder.  The smells more pungent.  Kendra couldn't breathe and she felt a tightening in her chest.  She heard the sound of the gunshot echo in her head.  The sick smile on his face as he lowered the gun and left her bleeding in the open doorway.  Kendra stumbled a bit and leaned against a wall to catch her breathe.  The more she tried the harder it seemed to be to catch.  I'm not ready. I'm not ready. I'm not ready.  Kendra's mantra played in her head.  She thought she could step out into the streets of New York and clear the fog from her mind, but she was overwhelmed by this city that had taken on this persona of violence for her.

Kendra closed her eyes and exploded in a mist of white ivory and cool fire.  The pale hue of her creamy skin and the brilliant flame of her fiery hair blurred into a fine invisible smoke as Kendra teleported away.  She reappeared on the mansion lawn.  Exploding into existence back in her safe haven.  Kendra collapsed against the mansion lawn and just laid there trying to catch her breath.  Kendra's brown eyes were watery as she stared at the stars above.  Her red hair a cavalcade of flame against the lush green of the soft, wet grass.  It took her some time to catch her breathe.

She thought she was ready to step back out into the city for the first time since being shot.  She wasn't.  Kendra was trying to hold back the tears that threatened to roll down her pale cheeks.  She coughed and rolled over on her side.  Back on the mansion grounds nothing could touch her. She thought she could deal with this, but Artair was right.  She wasn't ready.  She hadn't been out trying to vigilante or do anything reckless.  Kendra just wanted to take some pictures of the city.  She longed for quiet lonely Georgia nights.  Nights that were hers and hers alone when she walked down the street.  New York wasn't like that.  New York was busy all the time.

Kendra caught her breathe and pushed herself to her feet.  She did need to talk to someone about this.  She had planned to anyways, but... who?  Kendra didn't know many people who she felt she could really open up to.  Not in New York, not even back home in Georgia.  Kendra was for the most part pretty alone.  She had met a few people, but none with which she could honestly bear her soul with..... Could she?  Even Emily had seemed distant as of late.  She hadn't spoken to her in what seemed like days..  Kendra made it to her feet and stared at the front gates of the mansion.  She wondered if outside those gates were going to ever feel safe for her again.

I can't help it.  Daydreams facial expressions are just completely adorable and make me smile every time so I thought i'd share a few.

(When someone asks her if she's been staying out of trouble)

(Daydream: I'mmmmm listening.....)

(This one I used as her avatar)