More than a drink. That, Ranger could do. It was an open bar at the reception after all. Hopefully whatever force had made them swap would end by the reception. Ranger wasn’t going to hold her breath though. In her sample size of two experience, body swaps could last weeks. Ranger let out a sigh that turned into a soft groan at the end.

Noel asked if Ranger ever thought Sideshow would be up on the altar. Ranger had to think about it for a moment. Eventually she said, ”Yeah. I just knew it’d have t’ be a real special woman t’ put up with him.” Hell, that could be said for just about all members of Alpha team. ”They say there’s someone out there f’r everybody.” Ranger smiled watching the wedding that she had essentially missed all of so far. ”I guess that heathen findin’ Winny is proof of that.” The thing that surprised Ranger more than Sideshow getting married was how long it took. Ranger lost ten years and Sideshow was only just getting married.

Still facing forward, Ranger cast her eyes over to Noel. From what she had read the pair of them had been together for years and just kept on trucking. Even through memory wipes. Sitting there at the wedding it was easy to see why. They went well together and they could handle crises. Maybe… Maybe she could see herself marrying Noel one day? If so, she hoped that she wasn’t the one wearing the dress.

No sense worrying about that now.

Ranger moved her eyes back to the couple at the altar. They did a hand wrap then lit a candle. It was all very symbolic and to Ranger maybe just a little much. It made Sideshow and Winny happy though so who was Ranger to judge.

Finally, the time came. The priest said that Sideshow, “...you may now kiss the bride.” Sideshow wasted no time in kissing his bride. There was applause and “awe”s from the crowd. Ranger clapped along with the rest of the crowd. After it died down the priest said, “I now present Mr, and Mrs. Christopher Renfield.”

The newly married couple made their way back up the aisle and out of the church. As they left, the audience stood and applauded further. Ranger stood with the rest, finding her center of gravity off as she made the attempt. She went to button her suit jacket as she stood only to find air and then dress as she brought her hands in searching for the jacket that was there when she sat down. That misstep was the smaller of two.

Ranger turned on her feet to follow the couple as they made their way out of the church. One of her feet moved in an unexpected way and her ankle bowed out as weight went on it. Heels! SHe had forgotten she was wearing heels.

A quick grab of Noel’s arm saved her from either falling or having to flail her arms like a tightrope walker to get her balance back. ”Sorry.” Ranger said, she wasn’t sure how hard she might have yanked on Noel’s arm to stabilize herself. ”It’s… Been a while since I last wore heels.” And she had only worn them long enough to be decent in them in the first place. 

Then, with a sudden realization, Ranger poked Noel with a fast moving index finger. "Photos! Y' have t' do photos now!"

---

During the ceremony Rhia had been content to watch the ceremony play out. She didn’t need to watch her targets squirm. The man had been an usher, she felt confident that she would see the couple again at the reception. She could harass them there.

Rhia smiled to herself. The couple had kept, mostly quiet throughout the reception. A few noises here and there, but in general they had behaved themselves. Were they trying to keep a low profile? Maybe they would sell an act as being each other? Rhia was excited to see how it went.

She did steal a glance at the couple while everyone was standing to applaud. It seemed the new lady was having some trouble with her heels. And she had a reception to walk to. Rhia would have to make a point to not let her sit.

Someone for everybody and there— just introduced as a Mr. and a Mrs— was the living proof. Despite the previous interruption, the couple was all pride and smiles now from what Noel could tell. The crowd cheered and Noel as the Ranger couldn't help but clap too, even throwing in a 2 fingered whistle for enthusiasm's sake. They'd made it through the part where they had to behave. Should be a little bit more smooth sailing now, right?

Noel stood, only mildly alarmed at Michael's treatment of her ankles. He let her grab his arm and further steadied her body by grabbing her hip. "Lead with y'r hips." She'd had to practice before she left the apartment, too. Now Michael was having trial by fire and she didn't envy him having to deal with the cooshy carpet runner in the middle aisle.

And then, of course, there were still usher duties. He took the poke in stride until it hit him that now Noel was that usher. "Aw shoot." Which grannie was his responsibility? He asked Michael to point her out and then went for the side aisle to go fetch, climbing over the Wahls to get there.

"Sorry. 'Scuze me." Noel retrieved his flapping jacket and buttoned himself together just in time to offer a polite arm to his responsibility. "Allow me, ma'am."

"I thought you might have forgotten about me." Granny bat her eyes at him and Noel hesitated before smiling. She could lie now. So she did.

"I would never. Though, I admit I wasn' payin' much attention when they explained where t' go f'r photos. Would you escort me all th' way since we're likely t' be missed if I take a wrong turn?" Flattered, Granny Renfield chortled as Noel escorted her down the aisle.

She was a tough old boot, but her negotiations were fair. For the low price of one dance at the reception, she'd tell him where to go. Noel met Michael's eyes as they passed and mouthed 'good luck'.

Granny Renfield's deal seemed far, far less fair when the photos were right out on the front lawn. They'd return inside with the core wedding party once the rabble had cleared out to the nearby community center for the celebration.

Noel went where the Ranger was instructed. He stood and angled himself to make the Ranger look trim from years of training when taking photos as a woman. He stood up straight and did his best to not be weird when she smiled as him. It sure felt weird. It was more than just the jokes and ribbing congratulations, he realized. It was the fact that she didn't know how serious they were. She was so used to her power and the constant sensory feedback that now she was feeling adrift and untethered. Being in not-her-body and being treated as not-herself certainly didn't help.

"You're awful quiet today."

Noel smiled at the man, Bird or Blair. B-something was what they'd called him. She was getting them all confused, now.

"Got things t' think about." Were they supposed to pretend to be each other, still? Noel wasn't entirely sure how the Ranger acted in these kinds of situations.

B-man snorted and slapped him across the back. "Then maybe you shouldn't have gone in for that elective surgery." He gave the Ranger a quick once over and shook his head in disappointment. "I wouldn't've guessed you were so insecure."

Wh- what kind of surgery was he supposed to have had!? Noel could tell she'd made the wrong response by face or posture because the whole party, even Winny, devolved into laughter as the non-essentials were dismissed to the reception.

Noel helped steady the barely standing Ranger. The added support letting Ranger get the heels properly beneath herself and return her ankles to their full upright position. Noel provided her with a quick tip which would prove helpful as moments later after Ranger pointed out the grandma he needed to ush, Noel was off to take care of business. Ranger wasn’t sure who had the easier job. Noel didn’t know anyone but Ranger wasn’t certain she could walk to the reception.

When Noel walked grandma Renfield passed he mouthed her luck. Ranger mouthed back, ’Thanks.’ And found herself jealous of Mrs. Renfield. She wished Noel could escort her to the reception. It would certainly be easier that way for Ranger.

Closing her eyes, Ranger tried to think back to when she had last worn heels. She had managed to get good enough at walking in them to not look like a baby giraffe on stilts. She tried to remember how she had moved. An, ”Excuse us.” from Norma brought Ranger back to the present.

”Oh… I’m sorry.” Ranger took a deep breath and, following Noel’s advice to lead with her hip, took a step. Success. Another step and another success. Ranger made her way to the aisle. Norma giving Ranger an odd look from behind. Dragoon saw his wife’s face and after a chuckle whispered something to her. Norma nodded and gave Ranger a grandmotherly look as she reached the end of the pew.

The more Ranger walked, the more the act of walking in heels came back to her. The carpet runner proved its own challenge. She only managed to nail a blonde in a green dress from the bride’s side once with a shoe that achieved escape velocity.

That was embarrassing enough, but then Norma walked up and handed Ranger Noel’s purse which Ranger had forgotten. It was a little tiny thing with just a small little wrist strap. Hardly room for much more than just an ID and a credit card. Maybe a stick up lipstick too. Ranger could feel her face reddening as she took the purse.

Ranger was not unused to making scenes or feeling like everyone had their eyes on him. The difference was that Ranger was not… Ranger and the source of the attention was from Ranger failing to accomplish what should have been normal. Ranger was not a himself, Ranger was a herself. Ranger was trying to keep her head down and just make it through the wedding and reception and was failing horribly at it.

The rest of the trip to the reception was mostly uneventful. Ranger bumped into a few of the staff from BlacTac. With most of Alpha team being in the wedding, that left vanilla security staff. Ranger had met a few of them since he had come back to New York City. Most of them seemed to recognize Noel well enough to wave or say, “hello.” Ranger smiled and waved at them, wondering why after ten years ‘Howdy’ wasn’t the greeting drilled into all employee’s heads.

The rest of the trip to the reception proved tough in a way Ranger hadn’t expected.

The ceremony was over, everyone was talking. It was as if walking through the church and to the reception was like letting a weight settle into his mind… And a taste dispenser settle into her mouth. The more people spoke the more tastes Ranger had. Some worse than others.

Ranger made a B line for the bar. ”Whiskey… Whatever’s in y’r hand is fine. Neat.”

The bartender looked at Ranger quizzically before looking at the bottle in his hand that he had just used to pour another drink. “Yes ma’am.”

Ranger gave the man a questioning look at the word ‘ma’am’ before his shutting the look down. She was a ‘ma’am’ at the moment. When the bartender handed Ranger the drink she took it and pounded the whole thing back like a shot. ”Yeeaaccchh! It was certainly not a fine whiskey by any stretch and had a signifigant burn to it. ”Another.” Ranger said through a cough. Her hand waving for the barkeep to hurry.

He looked at the other man behind the counter who shrugged in response. The barkeep poured a second glass and handed it to Ranger.

Ranger looked at it and contemplated pounding that one too. Then thought better of it and sipped it instead. Like a classy lady who knew how to drink whiskey.

Armed with a drink, Ranger turned to face the reception. She surveyed the crowd. None of those who had gone to take pictures had made it back yet. Ranger decided to wait by the bar. From the bar she could see the entrance as well as most of the crowd in the room. Including the girl that Whirlwind had brought with him. Ranger blinked a couple timed because he saw another girl that looked like someone he had seen with Whirlwind a few nights back, shortly after he returned to the city. Ranger sighed.

”Oh, Gerhart.” Ranger said quietly to herself, shaking her head. It would not be the first time the man was dating two women at once. Hell, he even dated a woman while he was married to one. It was the first that Ranger knew of where the two were at the same wedding together. ”Y’ deserve what y’r about t’ get.”

When Whirlwind showed up, he went straight for the woman who Ranger had seen him with at the wedding. Then stopped when he noticed the other woman. He turned to walk out when the second woman saw and called out to him, “Jonas! Jonas! I made it!” Whirlwind turned on his heel to face the woman who ran over to throw her arms around him.

The first woman, hearing Jonas’ name shouted, turned to look and saw him. Then saw him being hugged by another young lady. At first she thought it was just a friend… That was until the second woman kissed Whirlwind. At that the woman who had accompanied Whirlwind to the wedding stomped over and after getting his attention long enough for his face to show he understood how deep under the he was in shit, slapped him hard across the face and asserted that his mother was a female dog. The sound of it was rather impressive.

Ranger strode forward to try and help calm the situation. Stopping a fight at a wedding is just something you have to do sometimes.

As Ranger approached he saw the first woman turn from Whirlwind to the second woman. Called her the same thing she had called Whirlwinds bother and tried to slap her. Luckily for the second woman, several BlacTac employees had made their way over and were pulling the women apart.

“Celestial feces! Calm down!” One of the men said yelled at the woman he was trying to hold back.

Crisis averted, Ranger stopped. Her employees could handle the situation. She had whiskey to drink… Noel was right it didn’t help with the taste. She grimaced as someone near her told a spectacularly terrible lie. She needed to get away from whoever had just told that. Luckily, that was when Ranger caught sight of Noel. She hurried over to him. On the way noticing the blonde in the green dress she had attacked with a heel earlier watching her.

”How… D’ y’ manage in crowds?”

Jude stretched his arms above his head to re-seat his coat and shake out the tension he'd been holding for photos. Smiling and being still wasn't too much of a chore, but worrying that his hair was escaping its careful combing and that me might be smiling with too much of gums showing... those more mundane worries had stacked up. At least he wasn't in most of the photos and got dismissed early.

And at the reception, his plus 1 was supposed to be arriving or just arrived. Jude fished out his phone to coordinate with Zaid and nearly walked right into a wall of Whirlwind's girlfriends. Somehow he was wrangled into helping keep the ladies from slapping one another, but... oh no... his hand slipped when he was supposed to keep one from slapping Whirlwind.

After that, he was much more diligent in escorting Ms. Second Date over to the bar...

"It's not like it was true love, y'know?"

"I know." He pat her awkwardly on the shoulder and passed her off to someone far more ready to mingle. Where was Zaid?

"Excuse me," Jude stopped a girl in a green dress who was clearly scoping out the crowd. "Have you seen a handsome man with bunny ears. And..." He blinked as he realized that his power was tugging at its leash indicating that this young, hella swol woman, was a mutant. Of course that didn't mean anything on its own... it was mostly just distracting. He pivoted and offered his hand for the shaking, instead. "I'm sorry, do I know you? I'm Jude. Along with the groom, I work for that asshole right over there."

--

Over there, Noel was sidling up to her own body and sliding one arm around her waist while scooping away the whiskey in his other. She already smelled like whiseky so he was betting this wasn't even her first. "Slow down, y' have all night." When she looked up at him, Noel knew to look away. Lord, this was going to be a long night. He knocked back the rest of the glass and cringed. Nope. Even swapping bodies, some things were still just not good.

"Be careful where y' point y'r eyes when y'r drinkin'." Noel pointed to the inner corner of her eye, a place she knew to be safe and where she'd practiced looking plenty of times. "Tha's where y'r gonna wan' t' look to give th' illusion y'r makin' eye contact withou' actually wiping anyone. And howdy t' you too." He leaned over and planted a kiss at her temple. Because Michael's body had no compunctions about doing such a thing.

Zaid had been nervous from the moment Jude had left that morning. Being the plus one to this wedding brought all sorts of excitement and dread all rolled up and crammed into his body. For one, it was for BlacTac, and for one of the mutants who had been on the mission to rescue Zaid. That alone had meant he tried extra hard to get a good gift. Thank the stars wedding registries were still a thing. It was also, heck, a wedding. Which meant dressing up. Which meant trying his best not to look ridiculous in a suit when he felt like a magician in everything he put on.

In the end, he had made a quick call to Javier, and used a bit of his first paycheck from the restaurant to get a decent suit.

When Jude went to the ceremony, Zaid quickly retrieved the outfit he had stashed and changed. It wasn't bad. The jacket had blue lining that brought out his eyes, the tie was a pale blue-grey, and the jacket was long enough to cover his tail. That only left the ears. Zaid had debated on and off about wearing a hat for this part. He spent a lot of years hiding his ears, but the more friends he made lately, the more he was learning to appreciate them. Just own it... He had said that once, hadn't he? He tried to remember the confident, sassier side of himself that sometimes showed up. He wasn't going to the ceremony so he wouldn't block anyone's view. Why stress for the reception, right?

Right.

In the end he left without the hat, the large carefully wrapped box in his arms and trying not to bounce with pent up energy.

Zaid got to the reception and got his gift put away about the time a cat fight was breaking out. He found it hard not to chuckle when he noticed Jude in the middle, and that one of the slaps could have been prevented but landed on a much deserving Whirlwind. He nervously flattened his suit, starting that way, when Jude got distracted talking to someone.

Backpedal. Should he interrupt? Stars, if he popped out of nowhere he would really feel like a magicians rabbit. He could wait until Jude finished his conversation.

Then the faint hum of jealousy gave him a nudge. He was here as Jude's date. He really didn't want to awkwardly linger. He found Jude's side as the handshake ended, and tapped him on the shoulder before giving the woman an apologetic look. "Sorry to interrupt. Spent all day dressing up for this guy and heck if all the women aren't keeping him busy."

The walk to the reception had been a struggle for Rhia. A struggle to contain herself and not break into giggle fits. Her victim, who found himself a herself, had to struggle to walk to the reception. She was able to steal a few looks at the trouble they were having as she walked. The heel striking her back was enough to put a lid on the giggles for a while though. The later embarrassment they visibly felt when an older woman handed her victim a purse they had forgotten… Well, it didn’t make up for it, but it did bring back the smile to her face.

At the reception, Rhia didn’t know anyone. She knew her cousin, Winny, but that was about it. She would have to make some friends for the night.

For the second time in one wedding, Rhia saw an opportunity to help teach someone a lesson. The first was with the couple who couldn’t keep it in their pants while the bride was walking down the aisle. The second was a cat fight that erupted over a man accidentally bringing both his girlfriends together at the same wedding. While the man needed to be taught a lesson, the two women needed to stop fighting needed to learn that it isn’t okay to fight at Winny’s wedding!

Alas, she could only swap the one set of other people. As the biggest offenders, Red Dress and the Usher would stay swapped.

Rhia found herself at the bar, and with a quick flash of her fake ID, had secured one vodka and redbull. She smiled to herself as she turned to watch the crowd. A quick scan showed Red Dress running over to the Usher. Rhia smiled evilly to herself as she started toward the couple. She wanted to mess with them some. See if she couldn’t make them squirm. She didn’t walk with any level of determination. She moved with the opposite of purpose. She didn’t want them to know she had sought them out. To that end she kept her eyes on the rest of the crowd and…

A dark haired man, about Rhia’s age stopped her. She recognized the man as one of the other ushers. There was a moment where she hesitated, wanting to continue on to her victims, but blowing past this other usher who could behave himself was a step too far.

Rhia smiled at the man who was asking if she had seen a handsome man with bunny ears before he trailed off. Rhia shook her head in the negative and the man carried on, introducing himself.

”I’m Rhiannon, or Rhia for short.” Rhia took Jude’s offered hand. ”You work for…” Rhia followed where jude was indicating. The Usher and Red Dress! Rhia quickly covered her surprised face with a neutral one. Taking a sip of her drink helped to cover the transition. ”Oh. The guy who couldn’t help but make out with his girl while my cousin was walking down the aisle?” Rhia watched the couple and crossed her arms. She didn’t have to act annoyed at the couple, she was. She only had to hide that she knew what they were dealing with at that very moment as the Usher’s body was taking the glass of whiskey away from Red Dress’s body.

It looked like the Usher was using alcohol to deal with the swap. That was a new one to Rhia.

Rhia looked back at Jude and asked, ”Do those two always make scenes?”

Someone came up to Rhia and Jude. Handsome, man, bunny ears. That must be who Jude was looking for. Rhia smiled at Mr. Bunny Ears and said, ”With a suit like that, how could we resist.” Rhia held out her hand to Mr. Bunny Ears to introduce herself. ”Howdy, I’m Rhia.”

---

Noel slid his arm around Ranger and stole her glass of whiskey. It was likely a good move, Ranger had already downed an entire glass and had made a significant dent in that one already. Noel told Ranger to slow down. Ranger looked from the stolen glass, to Noel, ”I haven’t had that much…” Ranger said, thinking that she likely had been drinking a little fast for Noel’s body. The statement did not taste of truth and Ranger scrunched her face a little at it. Noel, quickly looked away. Knowing exactly why Noel would be looking away, Ranger cast her gaze down at her old chin.

From just outside of her focal point, Ranger could see Noel pointing to the inner corner of Ranger’s body’s eye. She shifted her gaze to the spot indicated. Noel then kissed Ranger on the temple. It was weird. Ranger could feel the very faint beginnings of stubble growth. Not enough to give five o’clock shadow, just enough to scratch a little.

"Thanks" Ranger smiled despite herself.

It was a nice moment, all things considered. Had they not been in each other’s bodies, Ranger would have thought it a fantastic time. Instead Ranger was Noel, Noel was Ranger, and Lumberjack was slapping Noel on the shoulder and saying, ”You’re a braver man than I Hunter. As Winny was starting down the aisle.” He shook his head, ”She might have Renfield kill you in your sleep.” Then to Ranger, he added, ”Don’t worry, Noel. I helped explain how it’s all Hunter’s fault.” Again he slapped Ranger on the shoulder, ”And you look fantastic by the way.” Lumberjack turned to Noel and mouthed ’lucky dog.

Ranger simply gave a half smile and nodded at the compliment.

> ”You work for…”

Here it came... The anger sure did seem to know everyone. Except maybe just this once. Jude looked over and... yeah. That had happened. He snorted in delight.

"Ah-yyyyyyyeah. That'd be the one." Her cousin? "You're a bride-side girl. That makes total sense. I would have recognized you if you were of the Renfields." Because, aside from a small smattering of relatives, all the Renfield side was taken up by BlacTac employees. Jude's paperwork come to life.

> ”Do those two always make scenes?”

"Trouble like you wouldn't believe." Jude was more than ready to agree. "And inconveniences. Totally selfish human beings with, like, a tiny streak of humanity somewhere. Sometimes. But, yeah. Mostly they make scenes."

> "Sorry to interrupt..."

Jude's face lit up as soon as he heard Zaid's voice. He turned and scooped up Zaid in a hug that would have turned into a full swinging circle he there not been a Bride-side Rhia that he'd engaged in conversation previously. As it was, he at least lifted his bunny boy off his heels. It was only after Rhia asserted that the suit was a good one that Jude even noticed that he was wearing one. He more noticed the lack of hat and full stack of ears.

"You made it! I'm glad you made it. I didn't want to be stuck with only work peeps."

> ”Howdy, I’m Rhia.”

"Yes. This is Rhia from the bride's side. Rhia, this is my boyfriend Zaid Wylde. Zaid, we were just dunking on my boss. You know, the one who's dogs ate your hat." And now they were all on the same page in the same conversation. Hmm. Should he introduce Zaid to the Ranger? Jude stole a glance, but Ranger seemed occupied enough for now. "So I guess Boots didn't kill him after she chased his ass across the country for jumping bail. That's a bonus."

---

"Y'll get used t' it. An' get a headache in th' meantime." Even Noel hadn't yet found a cure for crowds. "So're we-" But he didn't have a chance to ask if they were pretending to be each other or spilling the beans on the swap. The man who'd been seated in front of them in the pews clapped his shoulder.

> ”You’re a braver man than I, Hunter."

Noel was slapped hard enough that he dropped the whiskey glass, mercifully empty, and had to let go of Noel to dive and catch it before it hit the ground. All in all, it was a small mercy because he was just a skosh alarmed at what came out of his friend's mouth. Looking down and away gave him time to get his thoughts in a little bit more order first.

"I saw an' oppr'tunity an' had t' take it." A lie. He felt a tiny bit bad about that. That was a thing people said about mauling their girlfriends in public, right? Noel was swimming WELL outside of her comfort zone. Driving outside her lane? TOTALLY MAKING IT UP. "An I doubt Renfield'll do much. He's boun' t' be occupied for at least tonight." Tomorrow, they'd be back in their own bodies and he'd let the anger smooth over tensions properly. At least, that was the plan.

The Ranger got slapped this time, and Noel was glad he hadn't passed the cup back to her for safe keeping as he'd planned. Noel smiled at the absurdity of the situation. She didn't even know the man's name. Or any of the guys in the wedding or... anyone, really. He laughed and shook his head as the man walked away.

"Y'r gonna have t' start introducing me around. I have no idea what jus' happened." He laughed again and steered them toward the bar. "But first, maybe another drink."

All Zaid's anxiety mented with the hug, and the embrace made him laugh, ears flattening with the rush of happiness. He was glad he came, and he was glad he didn't hover awkwardly by the door and let Jude keep talking to people. That feeling of being out of place had no grounds when someone wrapped you in a bear hug like that.

Zaid greeted Rhia politely, looking much more relaxed now that he had been claimed. He felt less like a stray puppy and more like a boyfriend. That was a good feeling. "Nice to meet you. And while they did eat my hat, and took up your room, and continuously covered your clothing in dog fur, I sort of miss the giant bears. Maybe I can walk them sometime again. Although I do hope Revvie chewed up one of his boots for being gone so long. That is the only proper punishment for that crime." Ranger seemed like the type who would morn the loss of a boot.

"Your coworkers are much more entertaining than mine at least. Although I'm sure the amount of swearing is about equal. I think I learn a few new curses every time the sous chef burns something. The head cook is creative."

He politely steered talk back to Rhia. "So you're just in town for the wedding?"

”Groom side all know each other?” Rhia asked. Jude had correctly guessed that she was on the bride's side. She didn’t know a soul on the bride's side… And the groom's side seemed almost like a fraternity reunion.

From Jude’s description, the pair Rhia had swapped were awful people. That made her feel even better about having them take a vacation as each other. She couldn’t stop a mischievous smile from crawling across her face at Jude’s description. ”Someone should put them in their place. Teach them that they can’t just make scenes anywhere they please.” She tried to quell a rising giddiness. More of her drink! Covering her smirk and stopping her own speaking with alcohol was the answer.

Jude’s face when he saw Mr. Bunny Ears was adorable and… Oh! Jude lifted Mr. Bunny Ears off his heels. Rhia let out a quiet, N’awww.” When the embrace was over Jude introduced Mr. Bunny Ears to Rhia. He was Jude’s boyfriend, clearly, Zaid Wylde. Jude caught Zaid up on the topic of conversation. THey were talking about Jude’s boss… Who has dogs that ate Zaid’s hat… and were giant bears? What kind of dogs did the Usher in Red Dress’s body have?

”I would cry if my dog chewed up one of my boots, if I was wearing boots like that.” Rhia had caught sight of the boots the Usher was wearing. Black Crocodile boots from Lucchese. They only cost a couple grand

”Your boss skipped bail?!” Rhia looked between the swapped pair and Jude. ”I… Think you need to find a new boss.”

Zaid brought the conversation back around to Rhia. ”Oh, no. I’m a student at NYU. Winny, the bride, got me to apply up here. They gave me a powerlifting scholarship and couldn’t turn that down.”

---

The slapping knocked the glass free from Noel’s hand. He dove to catch it which left Ranger standing there watching her old body dive for the glass. She chuckled at the site of her own body diving to save the small glass. Saving them from the embarrassment of a party foul. When Noel had recovered the glass and answered Lumberjack… Ranger grimmaced at the lie he told.

”I… Can’t blame you for that.” Lumberjack cast a glance to Ranger and then nodded as he looked back to Noel. Clearly he thought that he might have the same struggle were he in Noel’s Ranger boots. ”Yeah. Tonight… And maybe the rest of the weekend. Winny will get her pound of flesh though. You stole the spotlight from her… On her wedding day.” Looking at Ranger, Lumberjack said with a smile, ”After Renfield kills Hunter, wanna get lunch? There’s a great place near my apartment… Okay, it’s good… I like it, okay.” The amendments to Lumberjack’s statements came as Ranger made faces as the puffery landed on her tongue.

Lumberjack cast a look to the side, ”I’ll see y’all later. Gerhart looks like he’s about to cause more trouble… By… Well, you know Gerhart.” With that he walked off to help police his fellow Alpha Team member who was already talking up a pair of women.

”That sounds like an excellent idea.” Ranger said before running her tongue against her top teeth to try and scrape bad taste off. ”That was Charles Montgomery. He’s a member of the Alpha team at BlacTac.” Ranger looked around and pointed to Alpha Team members as she saw them. ”That’s Jonas Gerhart that he’s walkin’ to… That’s Jonathan Wahl an’ his wife Norma an’ she might think y’ f’rgot how t’ walk ‘r somethin’ now… That’s Demore Williams an’ he’s talkin’ t’ Tedward. Tedward’s not Alpha Team. Funny guy though, works vanilla security.” When they stopped at the bar Ranger said to the bartender, ”Whiskey.”

“The same thing as before?” The bartender asked.

”Oh… No. Macallan, whatever y’ got. Neat”

"Most of us work together on the grooms' side. Most of them served together." Which explained most of the comradery despite being buttfaces to each other, really. Jude was not born of that same fire, but he'd been adopted into the culture well enough.

Zaid chimed in and was really far too nice. It'd been a huge imposition on Jude, as well Zaid knew. Someone should teach them a lesson. One arm Jude looped around Zaid, the other he tried to clear the air of misconceptions. The Ranger was bad, but he was more ridiculous and irresponsible bad so far as Jude knew.

"He didn't really jump bail." Jude knew that much, he'd have to deal with the paperwork if that was the case, he was sure. "That's my petty revenge. Once he was gone for longer than expected, I started making up stories so if-and-when he did come back, he'd have plenty of explaining to do. See, I'm the guy who covers all the bases and makes the trains run on time when he's gone. And he's been gone plenty, but this was just the longest.

Only, he's so ridiculous Michael just sorta leaned into the rumors and now it's a company-wide sport. They're all trying to get him embarrassed since he won't explain himself."

Jude tried, and probably failed at not goggling at Rhia's arms as she explained her scholarship situation. Powerlifting. He looked at Zaid, then. "I think she could bench press us stacked on top of eachother." He... wasn't sure how to feel about that. He needed to get more swol, probably. Especially if he wanted to earn a place on Bravo team. Now was not the time to be asking for pointers, though... unless she was cheating her way through with her mutation...

---

It wasn't that the man wasn't attractive or giant or intimidating. It was that Noel would have to guess his name and there was almost zero chance that guess would be close. To have a complete stranger give her body that look? Noel cleared his throat and that was largely ignored. Which was fine because there was a bar to get to. He had to give his lady body an assessing look because... well, was it always like that? She didn't remember ever getting hit on so... directly.

"I was standin' right there." He grumbled. But there was a crash course in people he should know going on. He started to lean down, to take a taste and just get all that information directly from the source, but had to stop.

He didn't do that right now. He wasn't bothered by the crowds, but he also wouldn't get the benefits.

Noel tapped the empty whiskey glass down at the bar. It was ferried away in the blink of an eye. Bartender magic.

"I'm not gonna remember all that." She had an eye for detail, but it was a lot of detail. Instead, he kept his eyes on Michael. They just had to get through tonight. And possibly an assassination attempt later. "At least you still know 'em." And when it was her turn to order, she threw Michael's preference and reputation to the wind.

"Do y' have peach vodka?" Noel wasn't a drinker at all, but she'd picked up a few sorority memories and there was a fondness she wanted to explore. When the bartender checked and affirmed the peach vodka's existence, she ordered. "Think y' could cook up a peach cosmo?" There was a little back and forth about Liqueur, and in the end he was handed a peach raspberry cosmo with some fruit in the bottom of the glass and pink sugar on the rim.

"What?" He took a sip and it was sweet. Way sweeter than she "remembered." "I'll trade you if y'r jealous."

Zaid listened as Jude talked about his coworkers. Now that he could actually see the rather rowdy batch of men, it was a bit clearer what the copycat dealt with on a daily basis. That was a lot of energy, and, quite frankly, testosterone to go around. Zaid was glad he did not work in that environment. He would never measure up to half these men, figuratively and literally. Unless he got to count his ears. There were a few who were probably even taller than those, though.

"I'm only giving him credit because if he hadn't jumped town, you wouldn't have had the dogs. And honestly without the dogs, I'm not sure we would have met," Zaid said, tilting one ear down with consideration. "He deserves plenty of harassment for making your job harder than it already is. But unless you generally chase boys up trees, that accomplishment is credit to the dogs," Zaid teased.

At the mention of the lifting, and the muscles, Zaid felt his own envy, but it was almost buried under the comment Jude made. His face went pink before he could stop it and he quickly tried to correct his train of thought. "I think you already showed I'm easy to lift..." He tried to get that mental image away, but the color had already settled to his ears.

"So, student, that sounds, uh, exciting. Sorry, I just work in a kitchen, I really know nothing about powerlifting or any of that. Hopefully you're enjoying the city, though. I haven't been here my whole life, but it's grown on me."

The groom’s side had all served together. That made a lot of sense to Rhia. Veterans seemed to be a more eccentric lot and when a bunch of them are together they tend to be rowdier than most other gatherings by half. It also likely explained why two of the men on the groom’s side were drawing her ire. Jude had made a point to separate himself from the rest of them when he mentioned serving. He did look a little young to have served and gotten out already.

At Rhia’s alarm, Jude walked back his comment about his boss skipping bail. Rhia found it amusing as a way to get revenge on her boss. Spread stories about him while he is away. ”I love that idea! Though, it sounds like you really need something fantastic to use to embarrass him.” She cast her eyes over to her victims. She wondered if she should tell Jude about what she had done to her boss. ”Other than bail skipping, what did you come up with? Tell me the best one!”

Zaid mentioned that it was the bears that Michael and Boots had left behind that was what brought them together. The names were not as good as Red Dress and the Usher, but they were actual names. Except Boots… That was an odd name. Nickname maybe? Rhia wondered how often a joke was made about ‘knocking boots’ was made? Maybe not often considering the man she was with. Unless he made the jokes? He seemed the type.

”How long have y’all been together?” Which was also a way to ask how long was Michael away, skipping bail or making out at other weddings. ”Y’all make a really cute couple.”

Rhia snorted when Jude mentioned Rhia being able to bench press Jude and Zaid stacked on top of each other. She then covered her face with one hand. Zaid seemed embarrassed by the comment and mentioned how Jude already showed that he was not hard to lift. Rhia took her hand away from her face and waved it as she laughingly said, ”That is the weirdest way I think I’ve received a compliment.” Then with a naughty grin on her face added, ”Would it be nut to butt or six to nine when stacked?” She mimed like she was balancing a bar with her hands in front of her. ”Maybe sixty-nine. For balance.”

”I could take you lifting sometime. It’s… One of the most exhilarating things and it pays dividends .” Rhia casually directed her fingers toward her butt while her arms were at full extension by her side. ”I’m loving the city. I’m still getting used to how cramped everything is. I’m from Texas, near Austin and… There is just more room.”

---

The names from Ranger were a tad much to give all at once, especially when indicating people from across a reception. It would be easier if Noel could just kiss for the information. Which had Ranger seen him start to try. If only Noel’s power had a way to send memories to someone else, not just take memories. ”I can cover f’r y’.” Ranger said before thanking the bartender who handed her a glass of whisky.

Then Noel ordered and Ranger put her hand over her face. Noel was asking for peach vodka. Ranger didn’t know exactly what he was about to order, but it was likely something that Ranger would be teased relentlessly over. When the bartender confirmed they did have peach vodka, Noel ordered a peach cosmo. Ranger resigned herself to be teased about this for a long time… After the swap ended.

The resignation didn’t stop Ranger from giving Noel a face that said, ’Really?’.

“What?” Noel asked before taking a sip. Ranger just shook her head in response and sipped her whisky while looking over the crowd. Even while Noel, Ranger’s habitual state of situational awareness kept him scanning.

"I'll trade you if y'r jealous."

Ranger looked at the drink. Fruity and sugary wasn’t exactly her cup of tea. She bobbed her head left and right for a moment before saying, ”I’ll try it first.” She had never had a cosmo before. Beer, whiskies, and straight vodka had dominated her orders at bars.

From the corner of her eye, Ranger caught jude motioning. He was looking toward Noel and it looked like he was beckoning him over. ”Jude is waving y’ over.” Ranger indicated where Jude stood, with two others, with her head. One of the other two was the green dressed woman she hand sent a heel hurtling toward at mach Jesus. The other was a man with bunny ears.

Yeah. Fantastic was right. "Oh I tried plenty starting off tame and getting wilder. Spa weekend, vegas trip, vegas trip to marry Boots, Curtrona Virus quarantine, bail jumping, split town in a panic because he knocked up Boots, Boots hunting him down for myriad reasons, running for president since everyone else was, recovering from an enhancement surgery of a more sensitive nature." Jude smiled apologetically to Zaid. Maaaaybe he'd gotten a tad carried away. But when you're asked all day every day about a man's whereabouts, there's plenty of opportunity to make stuff up.

"No, I don't normally chase boys up trees. Sorry to ruin my reputation."

Rhia's compliments of their couple-ness made Jude puff up with delight. "Since before Christmas, right?" Not exactly a super long term situation... yet. But they were making inroads to something at least a little stable. And stable was not exactly the word he would use to describe Boots with a drink in her hand. Jude tried to get Michael's attention. He had promised to introduce Zaid, but the man seemed content to look anywhere but at Jude.

> ”Would it be nut to butt or six to nine when stacked?”

Her grin said she knew what she was doing. Jude spared a glance for Zaid before trying to fit his own foot in his mouth.

"Cheek to cheek, but I won't tell you which ones." Jude waggled a single eyebrow at Rhia. She had her own conclusions to jump to anyway. He’d meant it innocently enough and now he was a little afraid to see if steam and worry was shooting out of Zaid’s ears. Was he melting down from embarrassment? Rhia was almost sure they should be stacking 6-9-wise, anyway. He reached out to catch Zaid’s sleeve and give it a tug and explain.

”I have no shame left anymore. I have learned from the best. Do you know what Michael said about the rumor of him running for office? The other guy’s hat was bigger.” Because… that made sense? ”You’ve met some of them, but they were on their best behavior.” Jude tried again to get Ranger’s attention and only succeeded in getting Boots’. Ah well.

---

Noel took a second to orient on the guy that Michael pointed out as Jude. Michael said that he could cover him not knowing, but he didn’t know a lot. It was worse than not just knowing names. It was knowing nothing. He was new in town as far as he was concerned.

”Guess w’re goin’ in.”

He passed the girly drink to Michael and allowed a sip as he politely waited with Michael's paint-thinner in hand. Actually, it didn’t smell too bad and after a timid sip he realized that there was a difference in the first drink and this one. He still didn’t like it. But this was far, far more tolerable.

”What’d ya think? If I’m gonna be you, you might want both.” He was reluctant to leave the safety of the bar, but there were expectant eyes. He supposed Michael had people to schmoose and he was the man to do it.

”Hee---owdy, Jude.” Yes. Howdy was the one. Noel stuffed his hand into Jude’s and squeezed the everloving bones out of it, asserting her man dominance like men did. ”And this mus’ be-” Oh. Oh god. Why did he start that sentence? Noel offered his man hand to Zaid and just sorta hoped for the best.

Zaid listener to the various stories of escalating escapades the couple had been on, and eventually a sort of giggle had to be shushed by his own hand. His ears flicked back with delight at Jude’s creativity, and he further felt happy at the way Jude declared how long they had been together.

This was Zaid’s first relationship and it left him teetering between glee and nervousness sometimes. The sort of butterflies that threaten to turn into nausea at any given moment depending on what was said. He was waiting for the day jude decided having a bunny was not the most manly relationship, and possibly collect a girl for himself instead. It was hard not to feel the initial flash of doubt from time to time. But they were doing good. Heck, they had made the efforts to get a place together. That was a pretty serious direction?

”Yup, like the week before. I was working Christmas. Next year I’ll actually have to get it off.” His brain couldn’t help thinking agaead. It was going good. Why not?

Then, they ran with the joke. Zaid went pink to scarlet and covered his face with a hand, ”Stars, both of you are going to make make my fur pink. I’m working in a kitchen so I should get used to it, but...” he kept having mental images now. There were things he didn’t need to be thinking if at the wedding.

A distraction showed up, thankfully, and Zaid lifted his hand to see Jude’s boss. His ear twitched once, the accent feeling, weird. Also, how could Jude’s boss not remember Zaid’s name? He was pretty sure it would have come up before. He rolled with it, accepting the hand and trying not to flinch at the overly strong grip, ”Zaid, nice to meet you.”

Jude listed off stories he told about his boss. As he went along, Rhia’s eyebrows climbed up and she bit down on her lips to stop from laughing when he mentioned the enhancement surgery. She even had to look away, her eyes widely opened before having to make two attempts to respond. ”How big of a truck does he drive? Just need to know how much he needed the surgery.”

The pair had only been together since a week before Christmas. That wasn’t all that long. ”Gross. Working over Christmas? That sounds like the absolute worst!”

At Rhia’s question, Zaid began to change colors. Jude only helped compound. He suggested cheek to cheek. ”Ohhh, a man of refinement I see.” She said through giggles. She was imagining the options. Butt to butt, face to face, and face to butt. All classy options for how to be bench pressed by someone as a pair.

Perhaps because he noticed Zaid had turned every shade between his normal coloration and red, Jude explained himself to Zaid. How he has no shame thanks to who he works with. Then to punctuate his point said that Michael’s response to the rumor of him running for office was to say the other guy’s hat was bigger. Rhia froze bringing her drink to her lips. How? What? Why? Rhia had questions.”You work for a crazy person, Jude… I want to hear more about your job!” She said as she saw Jude trying to flag down Michael and Boots. ”Oh! Or meet him, that sounds like a good time.” She couldn’t help but smile an evil smile so she again tried to mask it by going for a drink.

Rhia had wanted to toy with her victims. What better way to watch them squirm than to have someone they work with there to help her along!

---

Noel passed the girly drink to Ranger. Ranger passed whisky to Noel. Ranger took a tentative sip. It was sweet, but not too sweet with a little bit of tart. A world of difference from the fire of whisky. Ranger took another sip. The flavor was certainly more obvious about itself than whisky. Well, more obvious than the whisky Ranger ordered. Macallan was a smooth whisky that didn’t have peatiness or an overabundance of fire to it. It was much easier whisky to sit and enjoy the subtle flavors in it.

There was a moment where Ranger was trying to decide which drink she wanted. She preferred whisky, but maybe the peach cosmo with its strong flavor would help with the tastes that kept invading her mouth when people spoke. Noel asking what she thought pushed Ranger to a decision, ”It’s… Better than I expected.” As for Ranger taking both drinks… Likely a good call. Noel would need his wits about him to play at being Ranger. ”That… Is a good call. Hold ont’ it though. People don’ try t’ hand drinks t’ someone already carryin’ one.” Ranger could foresee someone from BlacTac handing beer after beer to Noel if he didn’t have something in hand.

Ranger sipped at the peach cosmo one last time before heading off with Noel to where Jude, his boyfriend… Zaid that was it, and green dress were standing. Drinking and walking was out of the question. Ranger could already feel a buzz and she had to focus on walking. Leading with her hips she set off with Noel.

When they reached the group, Noel gave a very Ranger greeting… If you ignored how the ‘howdy’ started. Jude’s hand destroyed, Noel turned to Zaid and… didn’t know his name. Which was a bad look, but Ranger had only been told the name by Jude. It was only a little bit of a bad look for Noel to not know Zaid’s name. Thankfully Zaid filled in with his name so the pleasantry could continue.

”Howdy, Zaid. I’m M-Noel.” She held out a hand to shake Zaid’s hand, an eye twitching at  the sour taste she gave herself. She heard a titter from the green dress woman. Turning to her she said, ”Oh, hi. I’m sorry about the heel earlier.”

The woman waved off the apology and said, ”Oh don’t worry about it. It just happens sometimes to us girls.” She held out her hand and introduced herself, ”Nice to meet you, m’Noel. I’m Rhia.” Rhia had said Noel with a very slight ‘m’ sound at the front. Less pronounced than the flub Ranger had made but still there.

After Ranger shook Rhia’s hand, she offered it to Noel. ”He’owdy.” She said. ”Nice to meet a fellow Texan this far up North.” She smiled at Noel. Jude must have been talking about them. That or between the accent and the boots she put it together. ”Where’s home for you, Michael? I’m From West Lake.”