There was no chance that Robert would have been able to stop Lee from heading back into the building forever. But he had been able to slow her down enough, keep her from doing so long enough that most of her panic subsided and she was able to think rationally again.

And she realized that if she did go rushing in like she had been planning to, she was just as likely to get herself hurt and stuck as she was to actually find Tarin.

Plus, as Robert pointed out to her repeatedly, they had already called for help. The ‘professionals’ were on the way.

But Lee couldn’t just sit and wait, couldn’t just do nothing. As she stood looking at the building, Robert still very close probably thinking to stop her if she tried to run into the building again, Lee couldn’t help but feel frustrated at all the people rushing around yet accomplishing nothing. She could feel them all around her, moving quickly, some even running. Yet still, no one seemed ready to go in to find the people still inside.

She could feel people.

Wiping the remaining wetness from her cheeks, not caring that she was simply smearing the dirt, Lee stepped forward quickly, moving toward the building once more. Not toward the entrance, but the wall off to the side that the kitchen was on.

”Em! What are you doing? You just said you werne’t going to go in!”

Yeah, Robert was following her. ”And I’m not,” she told him over her shoulder as she continued walking. ”Yet. I’m going to start figuring out where people are so it’s not a guessing game once we get in there.”

He should be yelling for help, Tarin realized as he sat and sweated and tried desperately to make himself breathe slowly and calmly.

It wasn’t working. The air was definitely getting more stale by this point. People who were trapped suffocated all the time when the air was blocked off. It’s how people died in avalanches and mudslides. Too much packed too tight.

Was it getting harder to breathe?

More memories struggled to the surface, he’d been put into a closet once for…he didn’t know how long. It had been small and dark and the inside had been on an incline. He’d been cold and hungry and cramped and it had been so dark. Every time it had always been dark. Just like it was now.

He knew he should be yelling for help, but Tarin was afraid that once he started yelling he wouldn’t be able to stop…and if the air really was getting stale?

”What in the…What do you mean you’re going to figure out where people are, Em?” Robert asked as he started catching up with Lee. ”It’s not like you have x-ray vision or something.”

Lee stopped a couple feet from the wall about five feet to the side of the entrance. Thankfully, they had been in the end unit. That would make things easier. Turning to face Robert a deadpan look. ”Maybe, if you had listened to me once in the last 17 years about what I’m capable of, you’d know what I’m doing,” Lee said before turning to face the wall. ”Now back up. You’re distracting me.”

”I’m distracting you? You’re not even looking this way,” Robert said, though he did back up slightly.

Lee took a deep breath, eyes closed, her head facing directly at the wall the entire time. ”Really? Backing up two feet, Bobby? Give me at least twenty.”

Robert stared at his sister in shock for a moment. ”How did you know that, Em?”

”Later. I’m busy right now,” Lee said. ”And twenty feet, please.”

That said, Lee started focusing on her siphoning, trying to ignore all of the energy she felt behind her, as she felt for energy inside the building, slowly moving along the wall to the corner as she started trying to pinpoint where people were.

It wasn’t working any more. The chanting, the breathing, the distractions.

Tarin could remember each and every time he’d been put into a situation like this before. The memories were coming faster now. The footlocker, the closet, the trunk of an old car outside in the middle of summer. It had been so hot that he’d started to get delirious. In all those times he’d never once used his powers to try and help him escape. Not when he’d clawed his hands bloody, not when he’d been shivering with cramped arms and legs from trying to sit on the inclined floor of the closet, not when he’d been sweating and babbling gibberish in that trunk. He’d known the rules, known and seen what would happen if he used his powers in one of these situations.

That’s why it never occurred to Tarin that he could have reached out to the spirits again. Spirits that were there, knew where he was, and probably could have told the police, fire, and EMTs where to look.

It hot now too, Tarin realized, he could feel the sweat dripping from his face as he pulled his arms in tight and tried to tuck his knees in. Despite the heat he was shaking, he could feel it in his hands and the way that he kept bumping into the sides of where he was sitting.

How had he survived all of those times? How had he managed to not use his powers? Tarin could barely remember, but every time there had come a point….

But what was it? Whimpering slightly as his breath got more shallow and panicked and his hands started feeling and pushing to test for a way out Tarin couldn’t remember…but there had been one more time….

Lee had made it around the corner and part way along the length of the building. She'd been able to find six people and called over to Robert how far into the building she had felt them. She hoped that he'd recorded the information somehow. Lee wasn't sure she remembered which distances were in which order.

And Lee hoped that if there had been more than six people in the building when it collapsed, they had just been too far for her to sense.

But finally, Lee saw flashing lights pull up, and she hurried over. And it had taken some ‘talking’ for the emergency responders to ‘allow’ her to go in the building with them.

Some of that ‘talking’ might have involved telling a cop they'd have to shoot her to keep her out…

But finally, she was making her way back inside. And after she directed them to someone before the person was able to be seen by any of the rescuers, they actually started to believe her usefulness inside the building.

Lee didn't stop to help the first three that she pointed out to the rescuers. None of them were where the kitchen had been, so none of them could have been Tarin.

Reaching what had been the kitchen, Lee suddenly sensed two people. They were relatively close together, basically in a straight line from where she'd been outside. But now that she was closer, Lee could tell that one of the people seemed to be higher than the other, about a foot and a half off the floor.

While the other person's energy, buried under what seemed to be floor level because of all the debris they were walking on, felt…different.

Lee had never in her life noticed one person's energy feeling different than another, yet this…did.

And for some reason, it seemed like the person, the place, she needed to go to find Tarin.

Pointing out where the other person she sensed was, Lee moved over the debris as quickly as she could and started moving things out of the way. ”Tarin?” she called out as she worked. ”Are you ok? We're working on getting you out.” Lee just hopped to hear an answer, though she didn't stop moving pieces of the building to reach him.

The last time.

The last time had been the cemetery. Tarin had told Lee that he’d been locked in a mausoleum, but it had been a little stone building with room for little more than a coffin. It had been like this where he couldn’t sit all the way up, couldn’t stand…couldn’t breathe. Only this time, there had been spirits everywhere…at least until Tarin had pushed them away so forcefully that they’d stayed back.

There had come a point, just like there had been every time before where suddenly things were different. He was different. He could breathe, he could cope, he had moved to a place so far from himself that for a while each time it had felt like he wasn’t himself.

Each time, after that had happened, Tarin had been so exhausted and so wrung out that he had been able to be still, quiet…resigned…until someone had let him out.

It had been over 20 years since Tarin had felt this feeling, but as he gasped for breath in panicked little breaths and his fingernails dug into the palms of his fisted hands so hard he knew he was breaking the skin…suddenly something changed. He changed.

Tarin knew he was still there, but suddenly there was the potential and the need to become more. His entire body almost burned with it. He needed to be something more. So he would be.

More debris was shifting and Tarin could hear voices. He barely registered them because this was so much better than before. Now he could focus on what he should be instead of what he simply was.

Suddenly though, Tarin could hear a voice and feel dust and little pieces of debris falling as everything above him shifted and moved. If they got close enough, he could become what he needed to be in order to not have to do this ever again. Tarin’s arms and legs tingled with the sensation to the point that he felt like he was on fire…

”Tarin?”

Her voice pulled him out of the near-trance he’d been in, but the feeling in his arms and legs didn’t stop. .

”Lee?” he whispered. Why was she in there? Hadn’t he gotten her out? It couldn’t possibly be safe for her to be in there?

They were getting him out though? It was going to be okay?

Relief wasn’t flooding Tarin though, just that same fire burning through his body, that same…potential.

Suddenly as the debris shifted and moved above him, as light started to filter in and he blinked upwards, the pieces of the puzzle fell into place.

”Oh god…” Tarin said, curling up even tighter in the little space.

”Lee…you gotta stay back.” he said, louder now. Things were moving more quickly now, Tarin could vaguely see people there now and there she was. Tarin made eye contact, but it was very different than before.

”Don’t touch me!”

It took much longer than Lee wanted, but finally she heard Tarin’s voice. But she did hear his voice. And she sighed in relief before going back to removing the debris over him.

”Yes Tarin, just breathe,” Lee said as she continued working, only realizing then that there was someone else with her, also working on digging Tarin out. ”We’re going to get you out, Tarin. It’s-”

”Lee…you gotta stay back.”

Lee’s eyes widened slightly as she stopped moving. She could see the space that Tarin was in was small, and he was shrinking back even further as he sat huddled in there. He was still having trouble with the elevator because it was small. The only reason she could think-

”Don’t touch me!”

Lee's eyes widened in shock and fear. Then she saw out of the corner of her eye the person working with her reaching forward. Lee's hand shot out to grab their arm, she still didn't even know who was working with her. ”Get back,” she ordered, eyes still locked on Tarin's, the fear probably evident. ”No one comes close until I say so.”

”Em, just a minute-”

”Damn it Bobby! Will you listen to me for once in your life?” Lee exclaimed as she shoved what must have been Robert’s arm back and away.

”I won’t come any closer,” Lee said to try and reassure him, though she wasn’t sure how reassuring she was; being this close to a possible merge, even though it had been decades since the last time, was scary. ”But I’m also not going anywhere. It’s going to be ok. You’re going to be ok.”

Tarin was shaking now in spite of the heat. He could remember this feeling now, thinking that it was a panic attack and he was actually going to lose his mind. The dissociation that had come with it had been a balm though, for a while he’d been able to breathe and think. He’d thought it was a coping mechanism all that time, to think about being someone else…being something else strong enough to stop this from happening.

He’d been so stupid…and so very lucky. In their depravity, their desire to push him far enough past the limits of his capabilities those idiots had almost caused…who knew what. Nobody would have ever touched him then though, comfort hadn’t been seen as helpful, independence had.

Lee held his gaze and even though Tarin could tell that she was scared she didn’t leave. She was sure he would be okay, she was there.

Now that he could sit, Tarin pulled up his knees, dropping his head onto them for a moment.

”It’ll stop…” he breathed, ”Just need a minute…”

The sun helped, and the open sky, and the fact that even though now she knew, Lee was still there.

The vice grip on his chest was slowly loosing, and even though he was still shaking the fire that had felt like it was roaring through his limbs was beginning to bank. In he breathed, held it, and out…the way he had taught Kevin. He could do that now that he could see the sky. The collapse must have been bad, he realized, for that to be a thing.

Slowly, and over the course of a few minutes that felt like hours the feeling ebbed and flowed until finally there was nothing left, he waited another few moments to be sure.

Tarin was still scared as he looked up at Lee, the violent shaking from before replaced by shudders of relief and exhaustion.

”I…I’m okay now…I think…” was the best he could manage.

Lee could see Tarin shaking as he sat there, curled up into a ball. Some of the time, Tarin had his head on his knees, the same way that she had first found him what felt like forever ago. And when this was the case, Lee continued to move things out of the way to make the opening larger.

But when his head was up and he was looking, Lee’s eyes were on him.

”I know,” she said softly. ”I’ll be here as long as it takes. And once it's safe, we'll get you out. I'm not going anywhere.”

Lee honestly didn't know how long the two of them sat there, but by the time that Tarin spoke again, Lee had a hole cleared that was easily more than large enough for Tarin to get out.

She simply nodded at first, still not reaching in toward Tarin since he hadn't moved. ”Ok, good,” she replied after a few moments. ”Are you ready to get out, or do you need a minute?”

Was he ready to come out?

Tarin looked up at Lee, seeing her hesitation and nodded grimly. He couldn’t blame her, not in the slightest. Not when she’d been a part of one of these merges before.

His emotions were all over the place, spiraling, and that had to stop. So Tarin took a minute and a deep breath and pushed it all down and away. The trembling slowed, his fists unclenched, and his legs slowly straightened out as much as they could. Tarin knew he could deal with it later, right now he needed to be calm. Right now he needed to be okay.

”Yeah. I’m good.” he said, bracing his hands on either side of himself and working to climb to his feet so he could climb out. He was stiff, and now that he was trying to stand, Tarin could tell that he was going to be sore and bruised as hell, but nothing appeared to be broken. Dust and dirt, and who knew what else fell off of him as he stood and suddenly all Tarin wanted was to drown himself in a shower for a few hours.

It was a fairly simple matter to climb out of the hole that Lee had, quite impressively, made and once he was out and sitting in the rest of the rubble, savoring the open air feeling of not being in that tiny hole, Tarin looked over Lee, she was absolutely filthy too, but looked otherwise fine, ”You’re okay?” he asked?

Tarin took another minute, and Lee saw another deep breath or two, and then he said that he was good, that he was ready to get out. Lee knew that he had been ‘ready’ to get out ages ago, but now he was feeling it was safe to get out.

Reaching out to help Tarin, glad that she was finally able to touch him, he simply sat again once he was out in the open. So Lee stayed on the debris strewn floor as well, giving Tarin a quick check over to make sure that he wasn’t bleeding and had no obvious major injuries.

As soon as Lee was sure that Tarin was physically ok, Lee launched forward, wrapping him in a tight hug. ”I’m so glad that you are ok, Tarin,” she said, tears coming into her eyes again. ”I was so worried and they wouldn’t let me come back in until the search team was ready.”

At this point, Lee pulled back, the tears still in her eyes, but looking angry now. ”But how dare you do that!” she exclaimed, hitting Tarin in the shoulder. ”I told you not to do something like that! What if you hadn’t gotten in there?

“And god, Tarin,” Lee continued, tears spilling over now as she hit Tarin again. ”That is not how you tell someone you love them!”

Lee didn’t answer Tarin’s question, but he could see her looking him over as they sat there on the floor.

Tarin couldn’t help but be self-conscious, did this change things? Lee had always spoke about this kind of merge with near-terror and now she knew that he was capable of the same thing.

Tarin knew it changed how he felt about himself, but digging too deeply into it made the familiar feelings of panic well in his chest.

Before he could say anything though, Lee launched herself at him and Tarin could barely react fast enough to wrap his arms around her as she hugged him. All those little stiff and sore spots protested and Tarin let out a little, ”Oof…” at the contact but wrapped his arms around Lee and held her tight.

The search team wasn’t even there yet?

Lee pulled back now and Tarin’s eyes widened as she hit him. She was angry and scolding him, both for what he’d done and what he’d said.

Well, not what he said, but how he had said it and then she hit him again.

”Okay, okay…ow!” then, he realized that Lee was crying. His hands were dirty, but Tarin reached up and wiped away her tears.

”I told you I’d do anything to save you…and I thought you should know, just in case.”

Tarin seemed to understand her point with the second hit, or maybe she had just hit him a little harder than intended. But as he raised his hands to wipe the tears from her cheeks, Lee leaned into his touch.

And he had that, Lee supposed. They both had known that the other wasn’t going to budge in that argument so they had simply stopped talking about it that night.

Tarin hadn’t even thought such a situation would ever come up. ”But you saved me and Robert. What about you,” Lee pressed. He’d gotten her completely out while moving further in himself.

”And of course I knew that, Tarin,” Lee continued, a few more tears running down her cheeks as she looked at him. ”That’s still not how you say it for the first time.”

Lee lifted her own hands to Tarin’s face as she leaned in to kiss him, her lips lingering on his. When she did pull back, it was only far enough that she could speak. ”I love you, too,” she whispered.

Lee pressed him on why he had saved her and Robert and not himself and Tarin shrugged, ”There were only two close enough…” he said, a bit confused at what exactly Lee meant.

And…she’d already known? Tarin just stared at Lee when she said that, had he been so transparent? Why hasn’t she said anything?

It didn’t matter because she was kissing him and saying that she loved him too and in the moment Tarin was too stunned and too grateful to to do anything but kiss her back.

”I’m sorry…” he said, burying his head in Lee’s shoulder, still holding her close, almost like he was afraid to let her go. ”I tried…I didn’t know…it was just so small, and I couldn’t breathe..”

There had only been two spirits close enough. It wasn’t a good enough excuse in Lee’s mind, but it was an excuse. And since Tarin was alright, she supposed she could let it go.

Tarin looked shocked? Surprised? When Lee had said that she’d known he loved her.

But that was something that they could come back to if necessary because after she had finally been able to say the words back to him, Tarin had clung onto her, similarly to how he had after a nightmare and apologizing to her because he’d been in such a confined space.

Lee shook her head slightly as she held his to her shoulder and rubbed his back with her other hand. ”It’s alright, Tarin,” she said softly. ”You don’t need to apologize. Most people would have panicked if they’d been stuck like that. But you’re fine now, you’re out.”