Johnson Artemis had worked for the New York Postal service since his early 20's. Now into his late 60's, considering retirement, he felt he had seen all there was to see. The city had riots, monsters, deaged mutants, mutanted humans, and a number of things he tried his best never to think about. But on that morning, he felt things had reached a new level of... strange.

The brownstone he went to deliver mail to had recently been taken over by a young couple, one of which had rather recognizable bunny ears. They were nice enough, although the building was quite the project for them to take on. There were many things that were wrong with it, from electrical issues, to what he could have sworn he heard comment regarding a bathtub going through the floor.

It could be worse...could be like one of those movies with the moving staircases! He thought, remembering the magical movies his grandkids enjoyed. Imagining all the things that could go wrong if it were 'magical' misfortunes, he dropped the mail through the mail flap.

Letters billowed into the unsuspecting house, one taking flight on it's own and landing on the kitchen counter, the next spawning it's own owl which carried it to a nearby bedroom, dropping it on a pair of long bunny ears.

"J-Jude! Did you see that?! There's an owl in the house! Tell me I'm not imagining things!"

Zaid had just gotten up for the day, dressed in his normal work attire, when the spontaneous appearance of owl-mail made him halt. He picked up the letter, which was a power bill that slowly transformed into a school acceptance letter.

A school...acceptance...letter.

"Hey, look at this!" He quickly held up the letter as it finished shifting to a delicate parchment with fancy ink writing. He was focused on the paper, and did not notice the gradual changes taking over the room.

The floor had truly tried to kill them. More than once. That's why Jude was rooting around under the kitchen table to find that one squeaky board they’d found. If one board was squeaky, with their luck, the whole kitchen would fall through the floor and then catch on fire.

Sometimes, Jude wondered if bad luck was somehow a part of Zaid's power portfolio. Perhaps Jude accidentally was copying that aspect of his power and then... well, that would explain a lot of their current life together, really.

He worked at a floor board, but it didn't seem loose so Jude moved on to the next one. He heard Zaid being excited about something in the other room, but that was his normal and natural state. Jude focused on the floor. Was that the squeak? Did he seriously just hear a squeak?

”That’s nice, honey.” But the board wasn’t moving… the sound came again, followed by a light scraping and scratching. He sat up and clocked the back of his head on the underside of a chair. He hissed and scwunched his eyes shut.

And when he opened them…

Were those candles floating over the kitchenette? A romantic gesture this early in the morning? Or had he hit his head too hard? How many windows had there been in this room to start? Suddenly it seemed like too many windows. He started to count, but could swear it changed every time he tried.

”Zaid?”

Once, Zaid ended up in wonderland. Well, what looked like wonderland, complete with demented cards and a tea party where the loser, died. He had also found himself in some heavily decorated Valentine's dance, which turned into a swinger's event. That one had been less deadly, but still traumatizing. In the end, it was a solid fact that unusual places brought unusual dangers.

To Zaid, the change in scenery was less magical, more horrifying.

Floating candles in THIS house? He was sure the wallpaper was made of some type of concentrated super-fire-starter. Fire, flamables, it all had to go, and quickly! He momentarily forgot the letter in his hand as he reached for one of the flames, hearing Jude's voice from under the kitchenette.

When...when had their kitchenette been so long? When had their kitchen been so long?

Another owl swooped overhead, in a ceiling that seemed to be getting further away. Ceiling, or sky? He quickly dropped the letter, wondering if he triggered some type of curse that was taking over the house. He managed to grab the back of Jude's shirt, least something else appear and separate them in this haunted house. "Okay, I thought you were going for the animal communication power today? You know, to check for like, mice, not...owls. Did you uh, grab the wrong power?"

Jude was hallucinating, right? And by the way that Zaid's jaw dropped before he let the letter slip from his hands meant that it wasn't just Jude, the danger was shared.

"It's a gas leak." It had to be, right? "Let's get out and call somebody. Come on." She scrambled out from the table and reached for Zaid's hand, except... except he stepped on the paper envelope that the bunny man had dropped on the floor. It. Felt. Real.

Jude turned a slow circle, casting his power out and reaching out for any mutants nearby. There was that second floor mutation, barely in his range from the attached building, but... that was often there. There was Zaid. And... nothing else?

"Can the letter be opened?"

Jude said something about gas leak, and Zaid felt his eyes flash up to the candles. Like, gas and fire and BOOM His nose frantically twitched expecting the scent of anything toxic but all he smelt was candles, and owls, and....rocks. Old, wet, rocks. Like, castle walls. Like old, old walls.

Can a gas leak cause hallucinations?

Jude asked about the letter and Zaid grabbed it again. It opened and a piece of parchment unfolded. Zaid went to read it, but it seemed to dance from his fingers. He caught a few words like “magic” and “sorcery”, and the paper started to levitate towards the ceiling.

”Oh, no you don’t!” Zaid leapt after it, glad he had an impressive vertical jump, and landed on the counter that was now a long table. His ears twisted to and fro trying to make sense of their new surroundings. Handing Jude the letter he made a grab for the nearest object before it too could disappear, and found himself holding a frying pan. Well, it was something. The other dishes had transformed into goblets and a few little chocolate frogs that hopped away down another table. ”I...I can’t smell the front door. Or, hear it. Stars, I can still smell the bedroom though. But, it’s....moving.” he jumped down from the table holding onto the pan. Somehow it felt more useful than the letter.

Jude was confused, understandably so considering that his own eyes and power were contradicting one another. Every time he blinked something was different. He could watch as carefully as he dared and somehow, without his being able to explain the how or when, they still changed into something else.

Zaid jumped after the letter, which was passed to Jude, before his boyfriend grabbed up a frying pan. He hefted the cast iron like he might hit somebody, but... there was no one to hit.

"It's not me, I don't think." Jude held up his hands, which reminded him of the letter he still held. He finally cracked it open.

"Snogparts School of Wizardcraft and Witchery," he read aloud, confused at the old-timey paper and what must be hand-written inked letters that were alternatingly sprawling and then cramped as they ran out of space. "From Headmistress Sioban Kipperling, Order of Morgana, First Class. Dear Messers Wylde and Coilin, We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Snogparts School of Wizardcraft and... is this a joke?" He turned it over to see more writing on the back. It seemed like a school shopping list, but had fanciful made up stuff like "dragon hide gloves" and spellbooks.

By the time he looked up, the kitchen seemed to have fully transformed into some kind of great hall many times the size of what should have fit inside their brownstone.

He gaped.

"Pinch me?"

Zaid held his frying pan while he considered the situation, and the letter that had been read. Magic school, witchery, and a strange castle... if it wasn’t Jude’s powers causing chaos, or a gas leak, then it had to be something else. The bunny stopped looking worried and suddenly looked very thoughtful. He looked extra impressive since he was now wearing long black robes instead of his work uniform, and his hair still held its winter white color.

”Okay, I’ve read a lot of manga, and when the character finds themselves somewhere strange there is usually an explanation. Magical transportation to another world? But we have t seen any other people yet... and we saw things in the kitchen transform. Somehow that seems to go against pocket dimension theory... it could be a mutant’s powers changing things? But those usually have a limit...”[/i][/color]

A limit... when he was around Adapteds he only had to get outside their range for things to return to normal. He saw other people With powers limited by space.

His nerd senses tingling, he held the frying pan with renewed motivation. ”We need to try to exit the building! Or, castle. Then if it seems our house is stuck as a...magic school, we can deal with that problem with extra help? Maybe your coworkers know how to deal with magic? No? Just things they can shoot at probably...maybe my comicon friends are a better choice....” somehow he felt a local LARP group could tackle this problem.

Getting to the floor he started briskly for the main doors, and glanced only to ensure Jude was coming, objections or not. At the hallway a catbus plate was finishing its transformation into a painting of a fat lady who waves a hand fan at them.

It seemed nerd culture had fully prepared Zaid to take charge of the situation. Jude was glad because he felt completely out of his depth. Maybe the mutant out-ranged him? Illusions with a long range. He could get behind that theory, but... why? The letter was addressed to them both. What did somebody get out of this kind of prank?

"Yeah. The uh- the door. That's a solid plan." He had to laugh at the fact that his co-workers were not the ideal choice here. But... what if the comicon friends didn't like him?

It was crazy interesting that Zaid's pan remained a pan. That felt like a clue somehow. Like maybe they should start touching stuff before it was too late? or did touching things un-do the transformation? Jude gave the painting of a lady a poke as they passed and nearly jumped out of his pants when she urged him to stop and be serious.

Thoroughly creeped, Jude offered his hand to Zaid. "Maybe we should hold hands? I don't want a wall to grow between us." It was definitely for their mutual benefit and not because Zaid was navigating all the weirdness much better than Jude was. Nope.

Through the hall (that was much more hall than they'd previously had) there looked to be a wooden double front door gate type thing. Of course it was barred with a heavy iron crossbar. Reaching toward the brace, Jude's fingers smashed against nothing in particular. He stopped and felt and it was like a smooth, invisible bubble barrier, slightly springy but perfectly able to hold against a punch.

A quick peek out the side window, which was no wider than an arrow slit, showed that it dark outside in this world. It had not been dark before, they'd only just gotten up, right? Only after he looked back did he notice the parchment tacked above the crossbar.

"Curfew is in effect and no students will be permissed to roam the grounds until 5am eastern wizard time." He read aloud. "Huh. Uhm. You think someone else might be able to come in?" Was their front door locked when all this started?

Jude offered his hand to Zaid and the bunny gladly took it, feeling that was a smart idea in the long run. It was an odd situation when Zaid was more comfortable with what was happening than Jude was, but being trapped in their own house did limit Jude's abilities some. As they walked the halls, Zaid tried to look for clues to escape this. The paintings all seemed to match the posters he had seen from movies, and he regretted not watching any of them. He had focused more on reading and manga, so this was something he was not an expert on. Some of his friends could have easily listed ever magical incantation that would be needed to survive here, though.

He wished he knew magic even more when they reached the barricaded door.

"I wonder what time zone wizard time is...wait, probably the wrong thing to focus on. I can try calling out and seeing if maybe Andrea can open the door from the outside? But I think my cell phone was in the bedroom...Stars, I'm going to be reaaaaallly upset if it turned into a magic lamp or something and I lost all my pictures again!" The prospect of his phone being gone yet again was depressing, but hopefully all the recent pictures were backed up. He didn't want to bug Jude for their old couple snapshots again.

Zaid let his nose sniff the air once, relieved he could still vaguely pinpoint where their bedroom was. The smell of rocks was stronger now, masking everything else.

"I think our room was this way..." he gave Jude's hand a squeeze then started them in the direction his nose pointed. A few twisted hallways later, they were standing in a potions classroom with a small stack of manga looking out of place in the corner and a small All Might statue fused to a cauldron.

No cell phone.

He let Zaid lead, comfortable to just observe for the now.

"As far as we know we didn't start it. Are we responsible for ending things? Or will it time out? Whatever this is, it started... so it probably has to end...? Right?" Unless it was, like, a mutated escape room or dream or something. Since Zaid hadn't taken him up on earlier pinching, he was forced to pinch himself. And yeah, it hurt. Jude frowned harder as his brain started to over boil. There was more hallway then there had any right to be.

"Did we teleport somewhere?" They finally opened up into a room, partially their bedroom and partially something very incredibly funky. Jude let Zaid's hand slip away to poke around in what appeared to be a cupboard (Their closet, usually? He guessed it had a similar footprint, but did that even matter? none of the rest of the house did.)

The walls were shelves and the shelves were further divided into tiny little cubbies. Some held unspeakable horrors like a dried plant that looked like a fetus— He checked. It had roots. It was a plant, but it still gave him the heebies. The other shelves held things like a single winter glove. A pair of Jude's fancy work shoes....

"Hmm. Is this your phone?" Jude reached for what looked like a very flat confection. A chocolate bar maybe? Had Zaid gotten a new phone case?

Zaid considered the questions seriously as they walked the endless hallway. Inside the potions room (or their bedroom, if you looked at it that way) he answered,"I don't think we caused it. Nothing changed until that owl flew in, and I don't remember any owl related powers in this area? This seems complex..."

It would end, right? Zaid tried to look optimistic, "All mutations have a limit. Obviously we just need to find what this one has." see nothing to stress about!

The room still seemed to smell a lot like their apartment. The shoes certainly smelt like Jude and there was a jar of fur that seemed to match Zaid's hair. Why it was all in a jar, he didn't need to question. When Jude identified the phone, Zaid hopefully scooped up the object, glad only the case was chocolate and not the whole device. When he tried to turn it on, however, nothing happened.

"Why won't it...oh, magical interference, of course. No electronics in magic worlds. So we need...owls! Hey, did you happen to see any more owls since this happened? That might be the only way to call out," Zaid suggested. He set the phone back down and let his nose sniff for anything that smelt like it could be a bird. A nearby cauldron was blocking his sniffing with a smell that seemed awful mushroom like.

The truth was, they just didn't know one way or the other about any of it.

"No. Just that first owl and I didn't even see it. Just you?" Jude surveyed the shelves for a moment before making a snap decision.

"I think we should try to make a potion." Jude grabbed the baby root, freaky little thing that is was, he had an odd urge to grate it. "We might as well, right? There's got to be a book somewhere. Maybe we look for clues in the things that appeared?"

It was a best guess and better than standing around feeling like a dummy.

Jude made his way over to one of the benches and set the baby root down. Baby root rolled backwards and did not complain to be laying on its face.

"Mmmm. Here. There's a potion of free movement? Maybe that's not quite right." He flipped a few more aged parchment pages. "Okay. This is called Liquid Escape Rope." That sounded promising, right?

Zaid deflated slightly when Jude mentioned he had not seen the owl. That made Zaid feel a little concerned the owl had just been something he imagined. Because why wouldn't he imagine an owl?

But Jude at least saw the rest of this magical mayhem, so that made him feel less crazy. Or, maybe they were both crazy. That was always an option.

Jude seemed to be voting for 'when in Rome' as a strategy by grabbing different items with the desire to make a potion. Zaid felt his nose twitch once, giving the baby root a little sniff. It smelt like a cross between rosemary and baby powder. Those two things should NOT mix.

"Uh, before we start throwing things into this pot, is there anything in this room you're going to be incredibly upset to discover we destroyed in a magical spell? Because we've already seen my cell phone case turn into chocolate. What's to say this root is not your wallet or something really important?" Zaid tried to remember where things had been this morning. His own wallet was usually on the dresser, so he was guessing it was that book on one of the desks that had appeared. Would this little bottle of liquid be the cup of tea Zaid had brought in that morning? That seemed safe...

"Liquid escape rope seems safe...and the ingredients all seem like things that we have in the room... I wonder what the unicorn hair was before..." He picked up the silvery little strands that were gathered in another container. Did one of them have fancy socks maybe? A tie? It could have been a tie...

While Zaid's concerns sounded valid, it was ultimately an immaterial concern in Jude's eyes. Not because he wasn’t into materials. He definitely loved nice things. But...

”They're just things, Zaid. No matter what things they used to be, they're all replaceable." He skimmed the ingredients list with his finger.

Maybe his sentiment was born of his early years where he had nothing. Maybe they were a testament to his middle years where he was uprooted with, again, nothing. Zaid had brought boxes and nostalgia to their combined household while Jude had mostly brought clothes and a few utilitarian offerings. By way of space, the last few years he’d lived in just a few boxes.

Jude hesitated with his finger over the instructions.

”This says we have to channel ace-i-scion energy-” he squinted and struggled through the pronunciation ”-and invocation energy into the cauldron. Is that in a bottle somewhere…?”

Zaid opened his mouth. Closed it. He struggled with a slight rush of anxiety and then tried to shovel all that emotion away. Jude was right, they were just things, but Zaid always felt a bit more attached to objects after spending so much time on his own.

Maybe this was a good exercise on letting things go. Like a cleansing ritual. You burn old objects sometimes. Why not throw stuff in a potions for their escape?

"You're right...I just...I reaaaalllyy hope nothing happens to my first edition Gotchamon cards..." in went the ingredients. Zaid tried not to stare longingly into the cauldron like a sad puppy.

Aceiscion energy. Invocation energy? Zaid made a face, "I feel like those are big words even for those of us who didn't learn English as a second language. Maybe it involves a wand? A spoon? I don't think energy would be bottles, you would have to add it yourself..." Zaid decided.