"Heh... yeah... This sounds sad, but I usually get drunk alone." Yup, it really did sound sad. Even sadder saying it out loud. Then again, he didn't usually get this drunk. Wait... what was he talking about? He was hardly even drunk! He was super man! What, he'd only had like... how many drinks had he had now?

To tell the truth, he didn't remember much of what happened around this time of the night. He would never remember belting out Journey at the top of his lungs, nearly falling over, and singing more. He would remember the chili cheese fries, mainly because they wouldn't stay in his stomach very long. Damn where they good going down, though... He would vaguely remember Megan helping him out of this bar, and to the next one... Also, buying mints and taking a minute to relearn how to stand straight before entering the next bar... that he would remember.

One moment that he wouldn't remember at all had to do with a punching machine; I give you Saph and Megan's totally drunk adventure, part 1. Enjoy!

This place didn't have karaoke... but it did have t-shirts on sale with the bar's logo, which she had sorely needed after her friend had lost his dog partially on her. It was okay, though, she wasn't mad. She'd been thrown up on before; it just came along with having a good time.

She did however make a note not to let him eat anything else for the rest of the night.

Aside from readily available clothes for overly intoxicated patrons, this bar had other forms of entertainment. Tv's, a foosball table, a few pool tables, and, get this, a punching machine. The last of which drew her attention the most. A small crowd of men and boys were gathered around it, cheering each other on as they took turns to see who could punch the hardest.

With a lopsided, drunken grin plastered on her face, she hadn't thought twice about sauntering over to see what all the buzz was about, heedless to if her companion had followed.

"Woo! Go ricky! Break that things nose clean off!"

Of the five men huddled around, the one currently aiming a right hook at the dummy-bag seemed to be hitting it the hardest. Or, at least, she was lead to believe so due to the drunken cheering.

"Heya, boys.. what's all the hub-bub about?" She leaned in to one man, probably a little to far seeing as her nose bumped into his shoulder. He responded by grinning cheekily at her, and winking to his mates. "Just flexing the muscles, doll. Wanna give it a try?"

Flashing pearly whites at him, she took a moment to consider an answer for him. Half a second later, a stupid idea was formed, and she nodded. "You bet'cher ass I do!" Mockingly pushing up one sleeve of her shirt as she strolled past, she stole Ricky's spot as he stepped aside. The cheers suddenly turned toward her. After craning a fist back, she punched the dummy square in the face, and not surprisingly got a rather poor result in response.

"Aww, that's too bad! Want me to show you how to punch, babe?" The man, Thomas, was at her side again, grinning widely. With a pout on her lips, she eyed him, before shaking her head. "naw... but, I do have a little wager for you boys, if you're interested?"

The five looked at one another, all mirroring each others smirks.

Moments later, she was at her buddies side once again. With her hands on her hips, and eyes twinkling mischievously. "Alright, you know the rules. No cheatin', no low blows, and no weapons. Everyone get's one punch, and the first to knock him out wins!"

She resisted the urge to wink at the hero who was about to become a living punching-dummy, and dug her wallet out. She'd promised a hundred bucks to the winner, but was more than confident that she wouldn't have to part with her hard earned money.

Yup... Soooooper drunk. Still, he was feeling great! Like... he could punch Godzilla in the face, and the lizard would cry and run home like Forrest Gump. Heh... RUN ZILLA RUUUUN. "Heh... heh heh..." URP! Nope... no puking... Megan said no puking. He stood tall for a moment, and sipped his drink... water... dang.

He looked up at a few men standing around a punching machine, and chuckled as he saw the scrawny spider mutant give it a try. He stood as the woman brought them over... What was goin on? Were they gonna fight? Man, he hoped they wanted to fight. He could punch their faces and be all big man and stuff... Where was he? He looked to Megan, who explained what was going on to him... once... twice... three times before he understood.

And then he understood... Hah! This was the best idea ever! They stepped out of sight of the bartender and bouncers, and got right to it. "Heh... Yeah... knock me out... c'mon, tough guy... y'got this." The first man shook his head, looking to his friends... was he really around to punch this drunk guy in the face? It almost seemed too easy.

They egged him on, and he threw a wicked right hook, catching Saph in the right side. The drunk X-man put on a good enough show of falling over, and bouncing up laughing while holding his face. "Awww... man... that all you got? Heh heh! Next!" The first man grumbled and forked out his cash, cursing up a storm. He was sure he'd thrown hard enough!

It was time for Round number two... this guy was bigger... Same result! The third man stood there for a moment... and then figured the other two might have softened him up. He punched as well; it made no difference. Saph got up and chuckled, stumbling about drunkly.

Man, she already had two hunder-- "Man, this is bull@%$#..." -- three hundered! Giggling as the the third man to be defeated forked over a large bill, she tucked it into her wallet with the others, and patted it securely.

Th fourth guy opted out, preferring to keep his money rather than lose it on an obvious setup, while the fifth emptied his current bottle of beer, tossed it aside, and stepped up to take a shot. It was Ricky, the one who'd been hitting the highest score on the dummy when she'd wandered over.

"C'mon! He's so drunk he can barely stand right, get him good and I'll sweeten the deal." Ricky glanced at her, blenched loudly, and nodded. Whether she realized or not, he'd just gotten the wrong impression about what she meant, and he was just drunk enough to go for it.

Wrenching an arm back, he sent his fist careening straight for the drunkards face. When the hit inevitably failed to knock him off his feet, Ricky stared. What had just happened?... it had to have been dumb luck. "Wait, lemme have another shot. I messed that one up."

One corner of her mouth curled in a smirk, and Megan shrugged. "Another shot will cost you another hundred bucks." She lifted a hand and absently picked at her nails.

"Deal!" Steeling himself, Ricky set his feet apart, a real proper stance. He was determined now, if only to prove that he was a big shot, and that some drunk guy wasn't a problem to him.

Another punch came in, and he stumbled back once more, making it real convincing by using a nail and a bit of energy to nick himself a little right under the eye, drawing some blood. He guffawed a bit longer, and then stood tall, wiping blood from his face..

"... ere... Lemme give you all a ch- URP! BUUUURP- a chanch... to gitcher money back... I.. I will beat all of you on da punsh mashine... And... and If I win... another 50 from eash of you..." The men looked at each other... they had to win their money back, right? They were drunk, sure, but not enough not to want to win their money back... Besides, this guy was beat up and drunk out of his mind! How could he out punch them?

One by one they took turns smacking the bag up into the machine, reading the measurements with woops and grins. There was no way this moderately build drunk man could outpunch them!

He looked at the highest score for a second... 642... not bad at all... He stumbled into place, losing his balance for a second, and then standing tall again. "Woah... who put that step there....heh... Alrigh..." He turned to the bag, and gave it a good left hook, draining a fair bit of energy...

CRACK!

. . .

999! He held up his hands in victory, and nearly fell on his face, as the men protested, and cried foul... It took them a while to get them to pay, but by now they couldn't take their money back... half the bar was watching.

"....Dude... we just got seven hundred bucks..." Her wallet was so full, she didn't know what to do with it. It didn't even want to fit back into her pocket! Staggering along giggly beside her pal, she attempted to tuck her hands into her pockets, failed twice, and managed on the third to hook her thumbs in sloppily.

They were on their way to another bar, because no one in the last wanted to place any more bets, or sit next to them, for that matter. "Say... what'm I s'pposed to call you, anyway?" She attempted to elbow him, but stumbled herself and had to abandon the action to catch her balance. Who'd made these damn sidewalks? They were all crooked and junk.

"I mean, ya know my name and whatever, but you never gave me anythin' ta call ya by... other than yer hero name."

Or... maybe he had, and she just couldn't remember it at the moment. She was kinda drunk... and it was all his fault. He'd gone and dared her to drink that whole bottle of rum... How was she supposed to refuse?!

Waltzing into the next bar like she owned the place, Megan made slow, wobbly beeline toward the bar and claimed the nearest seat with an open one beside her. She glanced around after flailing at a bartender (her way of waving one over), before she spotted a nervous looking kid sitting on the other side of her. The dull clack of two beers being set down in the counter before her and Saph drew her attention away before she had the chance to open her mouth and say something terrible at the kid.

"Cheers!" Merrily grabbing up her bottle, she clinked it against her companions, then took a greedy sip.

Saph's sip wasn't so greedy... In fact, he was starting to sober up a little bit... Man, did he have a cut on his face? He rubbed it a little more. The bartender looked at him like he knew he would be bad news when he stumbled in behind Megan.

"Who, Me? I'm Saphirush... I mean... Saph... Call me Saph..." He steadied himself against the bar, and looked around for a moment. They were in a new place... He didn't remember walking here... He needed to cut back more... At least he wasn't drinking hard A anymore... He had that feeling in his gut like he'd thrown up. "Bartender... Could I get a water, too? Thanks."

Jesus, he could really use a shower... "So... How long you been staying at the mansion? Couldn't help but notice that..." He'd been working security; it didn't take long for him to see her an Gawain hanging out. "And... Eh... What're you doin with the team leader... Nuthin he'll regret later, I hope." He knew Gawain had a girlfriend, but the young knight was just that, young... Maybe she and him?

Hmm... Maybe not. She didn't seem to be his type, after all... She was more likely to date a bad person... Someone older, too. Chicks like her always fell for people who were like that. Dangerous, mysterious... Them types. Heh... That's kinda what he was like in the future, wasn't it? Kinda backed up his claim, there.

Wait a sec... did she know he lived at the mansion? Damn, he hadn't thought of that... He supposed she would have found out later anyhow, what with him being around so often... Also, it was hard to miss that he was an X-man, and they were based out of Xavier's. Most of the X-men lived there anyways.

"Who, Me? I'm Saphirush... I mean... Saph... Call me Saph..."

Saph. After a year in the real wold, and three years in a fake one, a name she could say without getting shot via association was welcome. Calling him "Mister M" and "Judge" all the time was downright annoying.

"So... How long you been staying at the mansion? Couldn't help but notice that... And... Eh... What're you doin with the team leader... Nuthin he'll regret later, I hope."

She eyed him quietly for a moment with the mouth of her beer pressed to her lips, then finally took a swig. "Who, me?" She echoed, grinning from ear to ear. "I've only been there on an' off for a while... I'm Gawainya's roommate. I know, I know... not what'chu were thinkin'." She shrugged to herself, giggling, and set her bottle down. It was almost empty. She went ahead and ordered another one, before finishing hers off.

"Hey, um... can I have what she's having?" The kid on the other side of her spoke up, but she mostly ignored him. She was too busy staring off into space a little, thinking about said roommate-who-had-died on her in that dream-a-ma-bob. She hardly noticed both of the bottled the bartender set down, or the kid beside her snatching one, or the suspicious way he slid the beer back over after a moment or two, without so much as a word in her direction.

She did, however, notice that she now had two bottles. Blinking and shrugging, she picked the one closest to her up, and shoved the other toward Saph.

"waitaminute... what did you mean by 'regret', huh? I'll have you kno-- Uurp-- S'cuse me--that that kid is perfectly able to get himself into trouble without me." She nodded to herself, feigning irritation, and stole a sip off of her beer. " 'Sides, the first time I met 'im, he was in handcuffs. Can't get much worse than that."

The guy next to her, Phil, glanced at her for the billionth time, nervously tapping his foot under the bar in such a manner that he'd probably wear a hole through the wood before the night was over. Had she drank it? She was drunk enough as it was not to have noticed anything fishy, but.. he'd forgotten to keep his eyes on the bottle, and now he didn't know which one it was...

The X-trainee blinked a few times as another beer was shoved his way... Damnit, he was just getting coherent again! He sighed as he eyes his two full beers dizzily, not even noticing the full, uncrushed pill in the bottom of the bottle. He took a short sip, and looked back to her.

"Now, me and himher have been through a good bit. You better be tellin the truth, cause if there's one thing I've learned about you... You're trouble... With a capital... what ever the @#%$ I was talking about, hic!" He shrugged, and took a drink of his water... "Any chance I could get me some chilly cheese fries? Man, I could really go for some food right about now..." He vaguely remembered eating earlier... chilly cheese fries, actually... Every crappy dive bar had chilly cheese fries. God bless em for it.

He stood for a moment, stumbled a bit, and walked across the bar to go put money into the jukebox... someone was putting on rap music... He couldn't tolerate the stuff... Some nice classic rock... yeaah... that was the good stuff. As he was plugging the songs in, he found himself humming journey for some reason. He paused for a moment, feeling a little odd...

BUUUURP... Nope... Just his imagination. The next thing he remembered he was taking another swig from his beer.

"Now, me and himher have been through a good bit. You better be tellin the truth, cause if there's one thing I've learned about you... You're trouble... With a capital... what ever the @#%$ I was talking about, hic!"

Waggling her eyebrows, she didn't even attempt to argue. One, because he was drunk and there was never any point in arguing with a drunk (she would know, as people often told her that when she had one too many), and two, because he was mostly right. About the trouble thing. "Aww, don't get your undies in a bunch. I haven't' done nothing wrong at your mansion." She lived there sometimes, after all. No trouble on the homefront for her!

When he stood to wander away to the jukebox, she set about seeing if she could get him something to eat. He mentioned chili fries, and because she was also more than slightly drunk and had forgotten about her shirt change (where had that shirt even gone), she saw no reason not to tempt fate again!

Come to think of it, she was a bit peckish herself. She doubted a bar would have anything up her alley to eat, but hey, pretzels and peanuts were just fine, so long as you weren't a president or in an important meeting. Draining her new beer like a pro, she pushed the empty bottle away and mentally noted to make that her last one. Everything she'd had to drink over the course of the night had her shifting awkwardly in her seat to stay sitting, and more than once she'd turned to quickly and nearly fallen over.

Saph was back all of the sudden when she glanced back over at his once empty seat, which earned a good jump out of her. "Gah! Warn people when you do that, will ya? She wobbled precariously on her seat, pointing her bottle at him, before moving her eyes elsewhere. Like to the kid on the other side of her... Why was he staring at her like that? Did she have beer on her face? Lifting a hand to check while she shot a stare of her own back, she giggled to herself drunkenly and swiveled on her chair.

...maybe a little too fast, seeing as she actually fell off that time. "Ohmygod... who turned the world on its side..."

Saph guffawed as the girl in front of him disappeared, apparently finding the floor her best comfort after a lost fight with gravity. He shook his head as he grabbed his beer, and drained it, pausing as he felt something in his mouth afterward... The hell? He spit out that he assumed was a cigarette butt or something, but it turned out to be... A pill?

"The @%#^ is this?" he eyed the slightly dissolved pill for a moment, and then looked the closest bartender... He'd been around long enough to recognize a rufie. Did... the bartender try to rufie him? "Megan... get up... Something's up here." He was pretty lucky the whole thing hadn't dissolved... hell, it looked like it had only been in there for a bit... Maybe it took longer for them to melt than it did in the movies?

Ohcrap. He wondered how rufied he was... He was beginning to feel dizzy already! It was like he was... oh right, he was drunk. Well, maybe he was both drunk and rufied?

He noticed after a moment that his eyes had been locked onto another set... A nervous set... A guilty looking set.

"You..."

"... er... me?"

"Yeah... you... You and I gotta have a little chat."

"Megan... get up... Something's up here."

"I'm sure there a lot of things up there." She threw back, unwilling to move from her spot on the floor.... until she noticed just how dirty it was.

"Comin~" Hoisting herself up with help from the barstool legs, and then the counter, she glanced from Saph, to the guy he was looking at, which happened to be the kid she'd been staring at before she fell off her chair.

"Yeah... you... You and I gotta have a little chat."

A dark eyebrow rose, and she focused on saph again. What was there to talk about?

Then, she noticed a little soggy pill on the counter next to Saph's empty beer bottle. What was that... a breath mint? She knew he had some on him, but him spitting it out was unlikely.

Wait...

A few cogs started turning in her head, and a moment later she glanced at Phil again. Her lips curled into the widest grin yet, and she cackled at him. "Oh, man... I really hope you didn't do what I think you did... Don't you know you're supposed to crush em up, stupid?"

A moment later, when she realized that the pill had probably come out of the other beer she'd found in front of her, her expression shifted to one that was a little less amused. Throwing an arm around the kids shoulders, much to Phil's displeasure, she hooked her fingers in his coat and all but dragged him off his seat into a standing position. "c'mon, pal! Let's go fer a walk, shall we?" Tugging him along with, after she fished her wallet out and tossed what she and Saph owed on the counter, she headed toward the exit with Phil beside her. "Why're ya shakin' like that, huh?"

"Ohgod... please don't hurt me...I-I... it wasn't my fault, I swear! My.. my friends! They put me up to it!"

"Oh, man... I really hope you didn't do what I think you did... Don't you know you're supposed to crush em up, stupid?" Saph blinked a few times, looking down at the pill on the table.

"Wait, how do you know these things? Oh god, don't tell me you've- wait... nope... Not askin. So, buddy, what's your name?" He asked as he stood and headed out the door with them, swaying a little bit as he walked.

"Uh.. uhm... Phil." Saph grinned widely, putting an arm around the young man's shoulder. "You look like a Phil... You really do." He could tell the kid was in way over his head... I mean, he didn't he know not to crush up the pill! "Here's the deal, Phil... You, and us... We're gonna hang out tonight. Who knows! You might not wake up tomorrow, so how about we make the best of this night, huh?" He was pretty sure Phil was very close to peeing himself.

"To the next bar!" Even he wasn't sure what they were doing with the potential date rapist, here, but if they could scare the crap out of him for a whole night straight, maybe he would rethink the path he was trying to walk... That, or they would kill him or something... Meh. "Wachu wanna do first on this fine night, Charlotte?" That's right... It was getting late, but this night was juuuuust beginning.

"Here's the deal, Phil... You, and us... We're gonna hang out tonight. Who knows! You might not wake up tomorrow, so how about we make the best of this night, huh?"

With a giggle, she shook Phil a little. He was rather shaken up by the vague threat, and hadn't looked away from Saph yet. "Aww, don't worry about him, pal. He's probably kidding."

"...what?" Phil squeaked, whipping his head around her way. Man, who was this kid? It was like he'd just stepped out of a nice sheltered life, straight into criminal delinquency. His story about his buddies putting him up to it, though being rather cliche, started looking more and more likely every time he opened his mouth. She'd bet he'd never even touched a boob before, let alone attempted drugging someone successfully.

"Hmm.. well, I know a little place that isn't too far off, and it's a load of fun. I've got some friends there that would just looove you, Phil." Pinching his cheek, she helped escort Saph and their frightened charge down the street.

Twenty minutes of brisk walking and drunken chatting later...

"No, see... i'm telling ya, the guy was dead before he hit the ground!" She was damn sure of it! "There's no way he could'a still been breathing after that stunt you pulled. Poor bastard." Well, maybe there was a tiny chance, but meh. Who cared?
Turning a corner, the trio was suddenly assaulted by the muted THUMP THUMP THUMP of bass speakers from inside a club down the sidewalk. Crowded around outside of a plain building were large, leather clad men. Studs and chains glinted in the street lights, and as she approached, she recognized the weathered face one man in particular.

"Bonny!"

The man turned, smoke wafting out from a large, fluffy bear and mustache, and squinted in her direction. "Who's that?... Body looks familiar, but the face is all wrong." Grinning from ear to ear, Megan propped her free hand on her hip and winked at him. "How's Clark doin', hmm?" The burly, leather clad man coughed, nearly inhaling his cigarette. "Alright, alright, shut yer yapper.... What happened to your face? You fall off the back of a truck or something?"

"Meh, it's not that interesting of a story, really. But, hey, I got a favor to ask you..." Stepping away from Saph and Phil, she shuffled off to have a private conversation with Bonny. After much whispering, giggling, and glancing over shoulders, the both of them wandered back. The grin on Megan's face was stretched so far it hurt her cheeks, but it was totally worth it.

"Look's like you've been getting yourself in trouble, friend." Bonny chuckled, flicking his smoke away, then waving a few equally burly pals over. "We've got ourselves a bad egg, boys! Let's show him the time of his life, shall we?" With dour expressions, Bonny's boys stepped forward and seized Phil by the arms. He put up surprisingly little fight as they dragged him off with his feet dangling through the shaded doors of the club.

Bonny chuckled, holding out an elbow in Megan's direction, which she looped her arm through. "C'mon, Saph! Don't want to miss the party!"

Inside the building, past the darkly tinted windows and doors, a whole new setting unfolded. The placed was packed with men... large, muscle bound, leather clad men... with surprisingly little clothing on. "Let's get our friend here some more suitable clothes, hmm?" Phil was carted off into the crowd, toward a back room, and Bonny glanced at Saph. "What about him?" Megan glanced at him as well, shaking her head. "Naw, he's good. Got any good seats? Preferably somewhere near the stage?" Her burly pal grinned, his weather face wrinkling, and his mustache twitched.

"You're a terrible person, Megan. I ever tell you that?" The only reply he got while escorting them further in, through a sea of bumping, grinding dancers, was a small smirk.

Wow. If he hadn't been accidentally rufied by this guy, he might have felt very, very sorry for him.

As it was, he really couldn't. In hindsight, if he were completely sober, he would have probably just given the guy a good beating and gone home, but terrorizing the poor kid and sending him on his way just seemed like the right thing to do at the time; and boy was it the funniest thing he'd ever seen in his life.

Before too long he was sitting in a very strange club, watching the stage, a drink in his hand as Phil waddled out onto stage, his hands bound, wearing a giant egg costume. The crowd screamed and whistled as if they knew what was coming, but Saph didn't have a clue; all Megan would give him was a knowing smile and a loud laugh. Two big burly men in leather suits dragged the egg onto the stage, and up to the mic, where they let him go... He looked around nervously, jumping when a whip was cracked behind him. "A-ah! Um... uh... I'm a bad egg... look at me.... I'm a bad egg... um..." WHIP-CRACK- "W-watch me be! I was the worst of the batch... now th-the bad eggs going to hatch."

With a sharp tug, the costume was pulled off, revealing nothing other than a diaper... How did they get him into that? Oh... poor man... The crowd loved it though. Saph couldn't stop laughing as he looked around, still confused. "The hell is this place?" The baby was paraded around stage, dragged behind curtains, told to do some pretty humiliating stuff, some of which Saph would force himself to forget... In the end, they dragged him off, much to the crowd's displeasure. Apparently he was a born star.

Bonnie came to invite them back after the show was over, to collect their prisoner. Honestly, Saph didn't know where to start when it came to topping that... They would have to go to another bar to get the brain juices flowing, there.

One round of forced karaoke there, and a few more drinks, and the juices were starting to flow just fine! Part of his plan involved getting poor Phil terribly drunk.