Parrotical Adventures of a Pirate

Nico woke up. The sky-light brightened the small-square-room of Elizabeth and Girl-That-Doesn’t-Like-Birds. It let him see that he was alone. He didn’t really like being alone. Alone was boring. He didn’t like to be bored. Elizabeth and the other human weren’t there. Probably at “Skewl”. Sounded bad. Nico was glad he wasn’t human. He ‘s better than humans, anyways. He can fly. But he can’t fly when he’s in small-small-barred-room inside the room. He could hop around and flap, but can’t fly. He wasn’t fond of tiny-tiny-barred-room.

Nico looked out the small door to the big-green-space beyond. It was pretty and entertaining. Nothing like the boring small-square-room when Elizabeth and Other Girl weren’t there. Things were always happening in the big-green-space. He wished he could be in big-green-space instead of being in the tiny-tiny-barred-room, but Elizabeth didn’t think that was safe. But Nico’s tough! He’s big! He puffed up his feathers at the thought, increasing his size. He just wanted to fly!

Wind ruffled his feathers as it passed through the tiny open door in the wall that led to the big-green-space. He really wanted to fly. But he was stuck in barred-room! If only Elizabeth were there to open his room. But that gave him an idea! “Squawk!” he cried in triumph. He knew how Elizabeth opens his room! He’d seen her do it! Elizabeth had wanted him safe, but she didn’t think he was smart. Nico’s smart. He can also fly.

Nico jumped and clung to the bars of tiny-tiny-room. He alternated using his feet and beak to horizontally move over to the sometimes-opening to the tiny-tiny-barred-room. Holding fast with one claw and his powerful beak, he stuck his left claw through. He bent his leg and clutched the bar, pulling it down. Then, he flapped his wings furiously and dragged the bar of its socket. Then the door opened and Nico was in the small-square-room. “Squawk!” he cried again. Nico was brilliant.

He dropped off the door and flap-flap-flapped to the dresser. There, he enjoyed being smarter than Elizabeth. But then another thought came to him. Wall-door-to-the-big-green-space was open. He could leave! Nico flew-flew-flew off the perch and soared outside. Nico was master of big-green-space. He can fly.

“Stupid!” he said, soaring into a tree. He was the best person out there. Better than stupid-four-leg-things and humans and other birds. He was also smarter than Elizabeth. Elizabeth didn’t know he could escape. Even she was stupid. But he still loved her. She was his human, after all. But he soon got distracted from his reverie. He saw something he liked.

He saw food.

But he also saw two humans by it. They were sitting on a perch by a perch. The food was on the perch in front of them. They were making a lot of noise. Nico ignored them. Weren’t Elizabeth. Weren’t Girl-Who-Doesn’t-Like-Birds. Weren’t Bird-Wing-Guy. Weren’t important. Food was. Nico cocked his head and stared at the yellow cake sitting on a paper plate on the picnic table.

And then he acted.

He swoop-swoop-swooped down and flared his wings, claws out front and open. The draft created by his powerful, powerful wings blew into the two human’s faces, surprising them. Then his sharp claws sank into the oh-so-good-smelling-cake and off he was! Stupid people made several loud sounds at him as he flew, but Nico ignored them. He was better than them. He was smart. He could fly. He had cake.

He swiftly flappedly-flapped away, looking for a perch. He’s been in the big-green-space before, attached to a leash to Elizabeth. He’d seen a perch before. He flew there. It was a big oak tree. It had many green leaves. It was also tall. But he could get there. He could fly. He easily landed on a wide branch. He dropped his food on it. Half was gone. It had fallen while flapping. But he still had cake.

He bent over and began biting into the moist delicacy. Nom nom nom nom nom! Nico pecked away at the yellow-good-bread. It was good. Even better than seeds from Bird-Wing-Guy. But he couldn’t eat it all. It was too much. But he didn’t want anyone else to have it.

So Nico grabbed the last bits of it in his feet. He flew-flew-flew away, toward a secret spot he’d seen before. It was a hollow in the top of a small tree by the big-big-big-house he lived in. It was perfect. Nothing had been there. He set his cake in there. Then he flew away, back to the small-square-room. Elizabeth might be back soon. And he didn’t want her to know he was smarter than her. It would hurt her feelings. He didn’t want that. Even though she was stupid, he still loved her.

But as he closed himself back in the tiny-tiny-barred-room, he was happy. He was smart. And he can fly.