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Lee and Tarin had finished cleaning the shop the day before, but Tarin hadn't wanted to open yet. The way Tarin was talking, Lee was starting to wonder if he'd ever want to reopen the shop at all. So instead they had spent the day together, trying that whole only him and her alone thing. Most of the day, they had simply spent together in the apartment, though they had gone for dinner. An actual planned dinner out, not simply going to grab some food.
To be honest, the day had been amazing. The bruise on his arm, the only remnant of the horrible condition Lee had found Tarin in, had faded to the point that it was blended into his tattoos. And without going to the shop once that day, there had only been a couple slips where either of them had thought about the attack, or whatever it had been.
Yes, the day had been absolutely amazing. To be honest, she couldn't remember the last time she had been this happy. Yeah, Tarin had definitely had a good idea with that whole him and her all alone suggestion he'd made a few days earlier.
They'd even rented a couple of movies to watch after dinner, but, as had been the case on many an occasion before she'd gone to Toronto, they hadn't actually watched much of the movie. The reason? Well, it was a chilly evening, even with her sweater on, so Lee had leaned against Tarin. Which had led to snuggling against each other, Tarin's arm tight around her.
All those things that had become so normal and natural between them now had such a sense of importance and significance. So much so that it had sent a chill through her body when Tarin had turned his head to kiss her forehead, that it felt like the first time all over again when she had turned her head in response and they kissed.
From there, well, Lee didn't notice much of anything as she and Tarin sat on the couch making out. She wasn't even sure how long the movie had been over for when they finally pulled away from each other.
Yeah, definitely an incredible day, Lee thought with a smile as she sat curled up under a blanket on the couch. Tarin had gone to bed hours earlier, but she still had too much energy to sleep.
No, at one point Lee would have had very little trouble making herself sleep with the energy she currently had, but the months of non-contact she had subjected herself to had changed that; she was out of practise.
But there was still a happy smile on her face as Lee thought back over the course of the day.
Despite everything that she had felt, thought, told herself over the last months, nothing about the day she had just shared with Tarin had actually felt wrong, uncomfortable. She'd been happy. Happier than she'd even thought would be possible for her to be again when she had been in Toronto.
Reaching out, Lee flicked the channel as the current show ended, then groaned. Ugh, of course, she thought to herself. They had to go and change things on me. Reaching out again, Lee started flicking through stations looking for something half decent to watch. Six months earlier, she had had it all figured out, when to change to what channel so she had been stuck watching a minimal amount of infomercials on the nights she was awake. Not anymore, it seemed.
Finally, coming across something tolerable, Lee set the remote down and was about to curl up again when the light from the TV glinted off her ring. Her engagement ring she and Tarin had shopped for together after she had asked him to marry her.
That thought caused a frown to appear on Lee's face as she sat there looking at the ring that was currently sitting on her right hand rather than her left.
She had been the one to suggest they get married in the first place. Tarin's brother had even thought they were married when they had only been together for two months.
And yet now, since she had returned to New York, it had been her who was holding them back, not getting them back to where they had once been.
But why, Lee wondered. It's not like she was still feeling the same as she had been when she first came back. Sure, there was still worry about touching him, touching anyone, but it really wasn't really as strong as it had once been. She had just spent a couple hours that night making out with Tarin for goodness sake.
Slipping the ring off her hand, Lee held it carefully between her fingers as she stared at it. Stared at the small diamond set in the thin, white gold band. It really wasn't much in terms of an engagement ring, Tarin had actually tried to get her a larger one when they had gone shopping, but Lee had never been much for a lot of jewelry; the small ring had looked perfect.
Closing her eyes and leaning back, Lee sighed. What was she doing? Should she be with Tarin? Even with her eyes closed, Lee frowned deeper than she had yet that day. Hadn't that night proved, yet again, that Tarin didn't care what her powers did to him, didn't care that she was constantly siphoning energy from him, that she could make him pass out from exhaustion and he didn't care. He knew it, he had felt it on how many different occasions, and yet he still wanted to be with her?
But hadn't her collar bone still been broken, her arm still strapped up in that shoulder immobilizer, a result of one of Tarin's merges, the day they had gone shopping for the ring? How many times had his powers, the merges, almost killed her?
She was still around. She'd rather risk death, risk it on a daily basis since there was no way to tell when a merge might happen, than actually be apart from Tarin. If that didn't show that she wanted to be with him, and him with her, Lee didn't know what would.
Taking a deep breath, Lee closed her hand around the ring, turned the TV off, and stood up. Walking quietly through the dark apartment, Lee came to a stop in Tarin's doorway. And looked in at his dark form in the bed as she bit her lip. If she really wanted to be with Tarin so much, why was she giving him such a hard time about everything?
But marriage? Lee asked herself, looking down at the ring in her hand again. Now that Lee really wasn't sure she was ready for. She had no clue when she would be ready for it.
Raising her gaze again, it took a moment to pick Tarin's form out in the bundle of blankets on the bed, illuminated only by the glow from him alarm clock and the street lights coming in through the curtains. They'd spent many nights laying in that very bed, or sitting curled up on the couch, talking about wedding plans. Well, maybe not that exact bed, but in Tarin's bed in that very room. But even before, nothing had been set, no date decided on. It had simply been talking about dreams, what they'd like when they finally did get married.
There really would be no rush, Lee realized as she looked in at Tarin, her expression half smiling half frowning. There hadn't been a rush when she had been far more ready than she was now; they hadn't jumped up and run out te get married then, why would that change now?
And Tarin would wait, wouldn't push her on this, right? With all the times that Tarin had told her that he'd wait, even if it meant he'd be waiting forever...He wouldn't push her, not on this. Now when Lee could count the number of times Tarin had actually pushed her on a single hand.
The frown slowly disappearing from her face, Lee's smile widened. Tarin went so far beyond being the man of her dreams, she realized. He was nothing like who she had thought she'd end up with when she had thought about her wedding as a child, he was so much different from all the guys she'd had crushes on is school.
He was so much more than the man of her dreams because he was perfect for her, maybe not perfect, but perfect for her. She might not be ready to rush things, but was there really a reason to fight everything like she had been? No, there really wasn't.
The smile still on her face, Lee turned away from Tarin's room; she was likely in for a long day, best to get some sleep.
As she walked into her own bedroom, Lee slipped the ring out of her hand and back onto her finger. But not the finger it had just come off of, rather the one it truly belonged on, her left hand. A place it had not been since the day she had thrown it across the shop at Tarin.
She was getting married! Maybe not for a long time, but Lee was actually going to get married.
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