Nicki wasn't playing nice today. She blew past the receptionist at the front of the Sanctuary. She ignored anyone walking by her and made a b-line to Kaz's room.

This couldn't be real. Sure, the Order did some negative stuff but with Abyss' history of being experimented on, held against his will there's no way they would ever do this. No way. She kept telling herself this must have been some mistake.

She walked into Kaz's room, finding him on the bed. She quieted herself for a moment, trying to make sure she didn't shoot out something that she would regret.

The room was empty and bare except for the boxes, cases for the various knives, swords, and other weapons, and suitcases that sat on the floor in the corner. There wasn't a speck of dust anywhere in the room. Nothing was on the floor. If the cases, etc, and Kaz wasn't on the bed, the room would look as if no one lived there. Kaz was laying on the bed, legs out, ankles crossed over one another. There was a travel booklet in his hand, many more were on the stand next to the bed.

He had heard someone coming down the hall with heavy steps, he thought it might be Abyss or one of the other heavier residents in Sanctuary. Kaz never would have suspected it to be Nicki. When she threw open the door Kaz dropped the booklet onto his chest and looked at her in surprise. Something was wrong, that was obvious as she visibly calmed herself.

He got a smile on his face when he saw her despite knowing something was wrong. How could he not? "Hey babe." He said as he sat up and scooted back so he sat up against the headboard. "What's wrong?" Though his face still held a soft smile, it was clear from his voice he knew something was up.

Nicki was confused as she walked into his room. Everything as packed up...she didn't understand. She looked around the room, then back towards Kaz, some her anger melting into confusion.

"What's going on? Why are you all packed up? Where are you going?" her voice becoming not only confused, but also some what frustrated since there was so much running through her head. "Kaz, what' going on?" she asked, her question coming out more desperate than she had orginally thought it would.

Kaz looked at Nicki with a serious and concerned look on his face. Kaz got up and moved to Nicki as he gave her a warm hug. "Here, sit down. You look like you're about to fall over." He led her to the bed. Sitting down with one leg bent an the other leg on top of his foot hanging off the bed to touch the floor as he faced Nicki. "I'm leaving Sanctuary and the Order." Before she could get any idea that he would be leaving her or the state, "Don't worry," His tone was soft and caring. "I wasn't going to leave New York. Even if I planned to, I wouldn't leave without you."

He leaned in and kissed her forehead. "I know this isn't what brought you here." Kaz's tone was soft and very caring. He thought he could FEEL Nicki's confusion. "What's wrong?" Kaz brushed some hair behind her ear, then began to stroke her hair softly.

Nicki's heart almost lept out of her chest when he said he was leaving the Order. Maybe he was leaving over what she knew. Maybe he was so torn up about it that he saw the error of what happened. Maybe this whole problem was over before it even started...

"Kaz...you wouldn't lie to me right? You'd tell me the truth?" Nicki asked, before shaking her head and starting again. "Kaz, did the Order kidnap an Xman? A couple of em even?" she asked.

Kaz was taken back by Nicki's first questions. It got him worried. Not for himself but for Nicki. <What's wrong? Is she okay? Is there something she needs but can't say?> His mind began to race, question upon question jumped into his mind. At least until she asked about kidnapings. When she did his mind went black and silenced. All his surface thoughts died instantly. She was right, he wouldn't lie to her, he would tell her the truth. But something in how she asked and in her voice told him there was more. Kaz paused and looked at Nicki. "No. Not that I know of."

Nicki looked him over...there was no thoughts that she could feel, he had cleared his mind. That was saying more than the words leaving his mouth...Nicki furrowed her brow, looking deeply into Kaz's crimson red eyes.

"Kaz...did the Order kidnap anybody?" she asked again. Maybe he didn't know they were XMen...seemed unlikely but possible.

Kaz's features were calm, solid, and yet serious. Kaz stared into Nicki's eyes for many long moments. He looked away, towards the floor across the room. <Yes.> His jaw tightened. He took a deep breath as he pursed his lips slightly, running his tongue between his teeth left to right, across the molars, to the canine, incisors, canine and stopping at the back right molars.

Nicki closed her eyes slowly as she heard his answer loud and clear. She sighed, looking down at the hand in hers. Nicki looked up at him, sighing again.

"Kaz...Kaz how? Why?" she asked, looking at Kaz, searching for a answer written across his face. "Why would they do this? Why would you help?"

He knew Nicki would be upset even before he answered, but hearing it...was crushing. He stood up and walked over to the desk, looking at the mirror, in it he could see Nicki clearly. Her disappointment and sadness clear on her face. Kaz knew what would come. Knew she thought that he was better than that, that he should have known better. He knew it was inevitable.

"I..." Sighing heavily. "I wasn't told why. Wasn't told what they were needed for. But I knew the basic of what the Order stood for. The betterment of Mutant kind. I was told they were needed." He looked at Nicki in the mirror. "I didn't find out until later what Oppressor's plans were. When I did, it was already too late. I was too deep in to do anything." Looking down at the desk he kept talking. "After we saved those kids and Jack from that research facility...I....I thought we were going to be doing the right thing. A different approach to better our lives than what the Xmen do, and have been doing for god knows how long, and they've barely done anything. I thought we could push it further. Could change things." His voice and words were true. He sounded as if resignation had found it's way deep within him, like he was tired and...old. That's how Kaz felt at the moment.

If she knew about the kidnapings, she probably knew about the experiments Syn did to them, so there was no use hiding it. Even if she didn't, telling her now would be better than her finding out later. "I wasn't there when Syn use Jack to experiment on them. I knew about it afterwards. But I thought...I thought it was for a spacific reason. Like, to find a way to stop mutants from being effected by Jack's power." He looked up at her in the mirror, sorrow on his face and in his voice, but also...pleading, hoping beyond hope she'd believe him.

"I swear to you, I didn't know they were gonna use Jack and her powers to...." He paused...he didn't want to say it. It would upset her... He'd come this far...no turning back. "I found out what Oppressor's plans. He planned to use Jack's power to exterminate every last human." His voice was soft and defeated. "I protested. I swear I did. I offered different alternatives. I did what I could. I even attacked Syn because she wouldn't listen." He gave a small chuckle as that image played in his head strong and clear, the kunai flying at her. "The next time I went to KP...Only Iris and Nail were left. I don't know what happened to the others. Not then, not now."

"When I found out the Xmen were going to attack us at KP, I tried to get those two out of there. I didn't know Syn injected Iris with the Haywire drug and sent her to the mansion. I took Nail upstairs and told him he needed to help us to live." He looked down at the desk again. "Yes I know that was wrong, but I wasn't going to kill him. I just scared him. At the time, and even now, I still think that was the only way he was going to get out of their with his life, or at least safely."

Kaz turned around, leaned against the desk and slid down to the ground, his arms resting on his knees, his head down. "I'm done. I wanted to do SOMETHING that had meaning. To help all of us. Even if the means to the end were less than...what is considered right. Most changes in the social system came about because people did something that, at the time, was considered wrong or evil. I thought...I just wanted......" Kaz trailed off, dropping his head between his knees defeated. He didn't cry. He didn't have anything to cry about. But he felt old, defeated, resignation washing over him.

Nicki listened. She sat there, on his bed, her hands folded, and listened. She moved very little, she said nothing, she just watching him. And listened. He wasn't lying to her, wasn't trying to snow job her. His mind wasn't blank anymore, his emotions were there to be seen. He wasn't lying. He didn't know squat and he did try to help. He felt true guilt for what he had done.

When Nicki heard Opressor's plan, she gasped sharply. He wanted to commit genocide. In that moment Nicki was more upset with herself than Kaz...she was actually thinking about leaving the XMen...about leaving the Mansion and falling in line behind someone who wanted to kill all humans?

When Kaz finished, Nicki stood up. She walked slowly over to Kaz, calmly...and grabbed him by the front of the skirt.

"I swear to God Kaz if you ever get involved in something like this again I will scalp that lovely silver hair right off your freaking head you got me?!" Nicki asked sharply, seriousness in her eye but all anger leaving...in fact, there was a hint of a smile on her lips.

Kaz didn't lift his head as Nicki approached. He didn't know what she would do. But if she was going to yell at him or slap him, he knew he would deserve it. Instead he felt himself yanked forward a bit as she grabbed his beater. She threatened him...THREATENED! Kaz pulled back just slightly in shocked surprise. He did notice the small smile on her soft lips. "Who are YOU, and WHAT did you do to MY Nicki?" He also had a small hint of a smile on his face. "I swear. If something like this happens again. I promise you can bite me."

"Oh I'll do more than bite you! I live with the people you captured! Do you know how awkward that will be for conversation around the breakfast table? 'Hey, girl whose boyfriend's club held me hostage, pass the butter?' No no, I need none of that thank you" Nicki smiled a little. She couldn't be mad. She knew there was this part of Kaz and the fact was...he was seeing that he was above that part of him. Sometimes it took falls to make you realize how highly you could stand. She was still mad at the Order, at what they had done, but not at Kaz.

She leaned up and kissed him softly, before lowering her heels back down to the ground. "Well...you're really leaving huh? Where are you going?" she asked.

Kaz looked at Nicki curiously. "What do you mean? Who do you live with?" Kaz was quite confused and intrigued. He already assumed he wouldn't be going back to the mansion any time soon, if ever. They'd probably attack him if he stepped into the building if not on sight outside the property. The kiss she gave him made him feel better, though not completely.

"Yeah. I was planning on leaving today. But don't worry, despite the travel maps, I wasn't planning on leaving the state, or the city. I was looking for a vacation area. I was gonna give you a call when I got my stuff home." It occurred to him then he had never told or shown her about his warehouse. "I own a large warehouse across the city, as well as most of the area around it. Myself and three others own it actually but they never go there anymore." Kaz shrugged.

Nicki sighed, hoping that the coversation about this had ended. "Kaz, you guys didn't just take mutants...you took kids from the Mansion...you know...wanna-be Xmen?" she asked, looking up at her boyfriend.

"You own a warehouse? How did you neglect to mention that?" Nicki chuckled slightly, looking up at Kaz.