As Noel told him which lines they needed to take, he felt relieved that he had managed to clear up any misunderstandings. He quite liked Noel; she was so… well free. She didn’t seem to care what people thought and in today’s modern way of living that gave you a form of freedom. Sam felt glad for her but also more than a little sad for himself. His whole life was built around what people thought of him and how they saw him. He did not like he belonged to himself in so much as he did not try and be the person he wanted to be but more like the person others wanted him to be.

So he had been a polite and obedient son, a good student. He had done community service and helped those in need. But never had he helped himself and things had gotten worse since he had come into his powers. It had been a shock to find out that he was not his mother’s most beloved person, because realistically if your mother does not love you that much who else will.

As he followed Noel through the station towards the trains, he tried very hard to push that dark train of thought from his mind. But then again he needn’t have worried for his companion once again uttered a statement that made him cringe.

"Sorry again about the kiss. Since you don't swing that way, I assume that makes it worse."

He closed his eyes and took a breath to summon some patience. Otherwise he felt like he might either sit down and laugh hysterically or start shouting at her. As it turned out he had neglected to mention his preference for girls in his previous statement and that omission had been deliberate. He had not wanted to sound like an overly defensive teenager that was offended by what she had said. He was and he had tried to hide it and now she thought he was gay. Great.

As they made their way through the crowd and pushed onto the train, he debated whether there was any point in trying to correct this new misunderstanding or whether he was just going to let it slide. It wasn’t as if he would see her again and he was a bit tired of explaining everything. But his pride wouldn’t quite leave well enough alone. So he looked for a way to explain it to her without there being any possible misunderstanding.
In the end he opted for the truth.

“Look the kiss thing it’s fine. I’m not gay so I’m not offended… I didn’t go on about liking girls earlier because I thought it would sound childish.”

As the doors to the train closed Sam found himself looking at his shoes again.

His words didn't taste like a lie. So... that was good. But still frustrating. How was she supposed to make it up to him when she just kept getting the wrong ideas because he wouldn't just say what he meant? "Seriously, Sam. How is anyone supposed to know what you have in your head if you don't communicate what you're actually thinking? Not everybody is psychic around here." And even those that were, couldn't all read thoughts.

Noel had to shift her sword to sit. There were plenty of seats currently. She wouldn't take a seat if someone else were there to take it. "If you are childish, you should be childish. What's wrong with being what you are?"

The train chugged to a slow start. Just like this awkward conversation.

“Seriously, Sam how is anyone supposed to know what you have in your head if you don't communicate what you're actually thinking? Not everybody is psychic around here. If you are childish, you should be childish. What's wrong with being what you are?"

He could almost taste the frustration in Noel’s words; she was right of course it was his own fault that he ended up in these kinds of situations. However he couldn’t help it, there was no way that he could break the habit of a lifetime just because she was angry at him. He also found it strange though, that his “lie down and play dead” personality should annoy her so. She was the first person to challenge him on it.

Oh sure he knew that a lot of people thought that he was boring or bland or whatnot. But no one had ever told him to go and get a life before. Maybe it was the fact that she always said what she meant, even if it was not socially correct. As it turns out he was probably her perfect personality opposite and now she was looking at him intently from the seat across from his, expecting an answer to her question.

So Sam what really is wrong with being just yourself? As the question floated through his mind the answer that came to him seemed obvious: Well everything. He was neither handsome nor interesting, the way he dressed apparently gave people the idea he was gay, he had very little sense of humor and possessed an unhealthy dose of self pity at times. So he looked at her and tried to find a more diplomatic way of putting all those ideas into words. Because he knew if he said what he really thought she would scold him again. So once more he found himself telling her half truths, the very things that had landed him in this dilemma in the first place.

“I… well. As it turns out people don’t like who I am, so I’ve given up on trying and decided to just be whoever they want me to be.”

Yep, there was the self pity, loud and clear.

I… well. As it turns out people don't like who I am, so I've given up on trying and decided to just be whoever they want me to be.

Sitting across from Sam on the subway made Noel realize that her arms could not reach his throat. All the same, she had some threats to make.

"I'm going to strangle you. And you won't mind 'cause you've given up trying to be a person!" She threw up her hands and leaned back in her seat. Clearly she wasn't strangling him. Yet. But the threat was there.

The subway slowed and hazel eyes flicked up to the window to check their stop. Yep. This was it. She hopped up and grabbed the front of Sam's shirt in order to drag him bodily off the underground train.

"That's not living, Sam. You're going to have to learn to buck up." This was tough love, free thanks to Noel's temper.

If Sam had not been so busy studying the floor of the train, trying desperately not to look at Noel, he might have been a bit more prepared for things to come. As it turned out, he was not. So when the young woman let loose the anger that had been building inside her, it hit him full force.

"I'm going to strangle you. And you won't mind 'cause you've given up trying to be a person!"

She was not shouting at him but there was an edge to her voice that made him keep his mouth shut. This was one moment when anything you said would most definitely be held against you. He risked a glance in her direction and found her sitting back in her seat with her arms crossed, the tension in her body was clear to read. He lowered his eyes again. Sam wished that her anger at his way of life, would spark some kind of anger in him but it didn’t, he just felt more miserable.

But as it turns out misery is not something you get to drown in when you are in Noel’s company. Because before he knew it Sam was being towed unceremoniously by the front of his shirt off the train. He did not resist and he reckoned that the other passengers must think them mad. That though however was short lived as Noel had not finished her assault.

"That's not living, Sam. You're going to have to learn to buck up."

To buck up? Even in the middle of this so called “fight”, the oh so American expression made him smile. It was the kind of nervous smile that threatened to turn into hysterical laughter if left unchecked. So he forced some composure onto his face and finally found the courage to look into her eyes.

“Ok, it’s not living. But tell me what am I supposed to be living for in the first place? I have no real friends, no girlfriend. My mother is shipping me off half way around the world so she won’t have to deal with me anymore, so tell me what is left.”

He knew that it was not right to take out his bitterness on her, but she had hit a nerve and now he couldn’t stop.

Tell him what he was supposed to live for? If Noel had a burlap sack she would hit Sam over the head with a pan and stuff him in it. But alas, she had no sack on hand.

"I can't tell you..." Screw socks, they were getting off on this stop because it was the closest to Sebastian's church. Noel continued to drag him by the shirt and expected zero resistance. "but I can show you."

Up the steps. Back out into the cold. Across the street.

The building didn't look like much, but there was a line going out a side door that wrapped part of the way around the building. The people in line were a complete mish-mash of humanity. Ragged clothes, untidy beards, unwashed skin, sometimes even mutant features.

"Your way of thinking is absolutely disgusting." Noel dragged Sam right up past the line and around to a back entrance into a busy soup kitchen. The smells were half delicious, half in serious need of a bath. "I think you could benefit from a little altruism." Only after the door had shut behind them did Noel let his shirt go. The fabric bunched where she had stretched it from dragging him around.

"Hi! Short staffed today! Are you here to help?" The man that greeted them had aprons in hand. How could Sam say no to that face? Noel's unhappy face? Yeah. Easy to say no. But poor Mr. Souphelper was entirely sincere.

"I can't tell you…but I can show you."

That fierce anger was still in her eyes and Sam felt wretched, which was why he offered no resistance when she continued to drag him bodily through the station. Passers by were staring at them with undisguised curiosity, which was also not altogether surprising as Noel was wearing a sword while manhandling him. He couldn’t help but wonder how his day had ended up like this; all he had been doing was heading out for some grocery shopping.

Noel dragged him out the station and out into the street. The place meant nothing to him and he had not even paid much attention to the name of the station they had just left. Great now he was going to end up lost as well for he would not put it past Noel to just up and leave him in disgust. That lit a small spark of rebellion in him, he decided to try and pay more attention to their surroundings so that he did not need to depend on her to get home.

It turned out that their destination was only a few minutes away from the station entrance. Sam had not known what he had been expecting Noel to show him but this was not it. She had brought him to a soup kitchen that helped the poor and the homeless. He had been in places like this before, as part of his attempt to be the perfect son and he had to admit that there was nothing to help cure you’re self pity that helping those in need.

"Your way of thinking is absolutely disgusting. I think you could benefit from a little altruism."

He did not answer her; he just took the time to look around. The place was clean and everything was well put away in an easy to reach place. The cooking areas were free of clutter which meant that the man now regarding them with interest managed this place well.

"Hi! Short staffed today! Are you here to help?"

Noel was staring at him again, the kind of look that said “if you back out of this I really will use this sword on you”, so he decided to go along, not that he would have turned the man down anyway. Composing his features as he was so used to doing he smiled back at the man and smoothed down his rumpled shirt.

“Sure where do we start?”

Sam had pulled on his counterfeit personality and Noel would either notice or chastise him again or she would decide to believe that she had bullied him into being a better person. Either way this kind of work had not cured him of his rubbish personality before and he doubted it would help now. But in the end helping the homeless was a much better occupation than buying socks for his step dad.

Noel took a swing at Sam's arm. He wasn't even protesting this.

"Hey, hey. Easy. Don't you have an action team to train or something?" The head volunteer put himself between Noel and Sam to prevent further bruising. That earned him a frown but some points for having a spine. Such a contrast from what she'd been spending her time with previously.

"Nope. We're both here to help. Sam might even join the training later, right Sam?" Now that was an idea. Noel would wear him down one way or another until she found spine.

Noel got an apron and a hairnet, same as Sam before they were both ushered to a sink where they washed their hands.

"Well that's just great. Uh. Sam, why don't you come with me to the serving line and Noel, why don't you go see if Martha needs help with ingredients for the next set?" Mr. Soup volunteer separated the brunette from the half-Asian.

Noel nodded, satisfied and stomped away to see what lifting or chopping was left for her. She didn't know about Sam's previous attempts to look like the perfect person, but she did know that this soup line wasn't exactly the same as every other soup line out there. This one was filled with those that needed healing and needed hope. But most of all, it was filled with people who were just fine with who they were: mutants who let it all hang out and because of their choice had found themselves in need of a hot meal. They were some of the most free people Noel had ever met.

"Sorry about her. She can be kind of... intense." The organizing volunteer found Sam a place on the serving line where the kid got to actually pass the food to the people who needed it. "My name's Peter."

As expected his casual acceptance of his new situation maddened Noel again and she swatted at him angrily and the manager of the soup kitchen placed himself between them. For a second Sam imagined himself sticking his tongue out at her like a petulant child but he wanted to keep all his limbs attached to his body so he quickly pushed that idea away. He was so distracted by this thought that he almost completely missed what she was saying to him. Something about training? Whatever it was he knew he would not be given a choice so he opted for the safe “smile and nod” option.

The jovial cook wandered across the room and came back with a couple of aprons and hairnets. As he received his new outfit Sam’s inner fashionista groaned somewhat, no one looked good in a hairnet. But he knew that it was an important hygiene measure and tried not to let any of his dismay show on his face. Besides it was funny to see Noel dressed like that, it felt a bit like dressing a small evil looking dog in a tutu.

He held in the laugh that that image conjured and went with Noel to wash his hands. They scrubbed them thoroughly and the silence between them spoke a thousand words. He could feel the unspoken “if you screw this up I’ll kill you” pressing down on him. However it seemed that the volunteer that had taken charge of them had different plans and he wasted no time in separating Sam from Noel. The illusion mutant was not sure if this was a good thing or not, but it was for the time being a break from her gaze.

As they made their way to the serving line the other man introduced himself as Peter and made an all too true comment on Noel being a bit on the “intense” side of things. That made Sam smile a little but he tried not to let the other person sense quite how “intense” his first encounter with her had been. He quickly introduced himself to Peter and then turned his attention to the line of hungry people waiting for him to disk out the steaming food before him.

"What is your problem today?" Martha was eyeballing the mountain of carrots that Noel had chopped through. The pieces were uneven at best, but the sheer amount that Noel had gone through in the short amount of time that Martha had left her alone was staggering. The volunteer was afraid to interfere with the knife work, but someone had to put a stop to it.

"That kid I brought in. He's an absolute door mat." The brunette skewered a potato so deeply that it was hard to retrieve her knife.

"And?" Martha grabbed the potato and knife combo as soon as Noel let go of the handle.

"And he's selling himself short and he's miserable and it's all his own fault."

"So you want to fix him?" Martha put the potato behind her back in order to keep the knife out of sight. Noel frowned both at the volunteer's actions and her words.

"Well, he's not fixing himself..."

...

Martha let her chop two bags of potatoes with strict size and shape requirements. Putting her mind to a specific task gave Noel the time to cool down and when her task was done she washed her hands again and went to find Sam.

She cleared her throat when she was maybe three paces behind him. "I'm... sorry." Noel neither looked nor sounded very sorry. She looked far more sullen.

Time went by quickly when you were busy and Sam was most definitely busy. The line of people seemed never ending which depressed him a bit. How could there be so many people out there that had nothing? How could society let this happen? So many questions swirled around in his head that a barely paid any attention to what he was doing and it was only when he burnt himself on the edge of one of the cooking pots that he came back to the here and now.

Peter was looking at him with an appraising stare as if to work out what his innermost thoughts were. But before the illusion mutant could say anything the other volunteer smiled at him and went back to what he had been doing. Sam frowned, what kind of an impression did these people have of him? Did he just look like some poor kid that Noel had bullied into coming here? Or did he look like someone who actually wanted to help? He knew which impression he wished to make but then again he also knew the truth. If the brunette had not manhandled him all the way he would never have know or cared about a place like this.

To keep his mind away from those depressing thoughts Sam turned his attention back to the people he was serving. They were of all shapes and sizes, humans and mutants, young and old. It just went to prove that bad things could happen to you no matter who or what you were. But when he met the gaze of a few of these people he saw gratitude but also pride. Whatever ills had befallen them they were going to face them head on and would do their best not give up anymore than they had to. Sam knew that if he was put in the same situation as they were he would not be able to hold on to half as much courage or dignity.

Then a noise made him turn. It was Noel; she was standing a few paces behind him with an expression on her face that made him wonder if she had just eaten something sour. He was at least relieved to see that she did not look angry at him anymore, or at least that her anger was no long a raging fire but more like slow burning ambers. He stood quietly waiting for her to either say something or leave.

"I'm... sorry."

If her tone and expression had not betrayed how forced those words were Sam would have had to sit down from shock. But as it was he knew she was probably only saying it to placate him, so he did not really believe her. Now all he had to do was find an answer to that that would not wake her anger again.

“It’s okay, it’s mostly my fault anyway.”

There was a little vein at the side of Noel's neck that jumped at his accepting the blame, but other than that the sword-wielder appeared to keep her cool.

"No. It's not." But she took a deep breath and that helped it be more okay. "I wish that I could give you some self-importance, but it's not really my place. I'm sorry to have abducted you. The store that sells athletic clothing and equipment is near a gym about two blocks south from here. They should have socks." She stuffed her hands into the pockets of her athletic shorts and frowned. That seemed her usual expression lately.

"So I guess this is goodbye. If you ever... well, if you need something. You can probably come to this church and get more help than you got from me. See ya." Yep. Graceful exit. She would find some action team and figure out a way to burn off some steam.