[AoS] Can't Sleep (Aurion)

Chase was not so astute as to register that Aurion might have actually been awake throughout the whole process-- he didn't realize how easy it had been to adjust Aurion's arm, or that Aurion shifted just enough to make room for Chase to wedge himself closer. Aurion readily curled around the child, and Chase noticeably relaxed. There was something reassuring in being protected by what was classically considered a monster. Chase again tried to burrow his face in Aurion's arm, some of the anxiety leaving his face.

He didn't fall back to sleep, either. The unshifted shifter looked around-- his gaze wandered to Aurion's "slumbering" face, wandered away towards the rest of their hideout. When Chase grew sick of looking about, he'd close his eyes yet sleep wouldn't come. Chase was laying with his eyes closed when the lizard-man began to speak.

Aurion's rumbling whisper made Chase cringe. Crap. He hadn't been as sneaky as he had hoped he'd been. He'd woken Aurion, and now he'd been caught. Damn it. The human-shifter hesitantly lifted his gaze, confusion and uncertainty swirling as a burnt-orange in his irises.

In the years since the bombing of New York City, Chase had changed-- his stature had grown, just barely surpassing five feet when unshifted, and his body had thinned down and developed lean muscles from high activity and scant meals. His face, however, maintained some of its childish pudge. Rather than constantly parading behind a human guise, the child's mutational control had gotten stronger, enabling him to meander about exposed, without fear of shifting involuntarily. Therefore, Chase often didn't don a human guise unless it was necessary.

Chase listened to Aurion's soft suggestion, silently wondering if he was getting the boot-- if he couldn't sleep, Chase should go do something, wear himself out, and then try again. Chase frowned, and started to sit up, dropping his gaze. It certainly sounded like he was getting ousted. Chase really was too old to be snuggling-up to the older members of the pack for reassurance. He needed to clear his head in a more mature fashion, independently and without cuddling. Chase rubbed his head bashfully as he wriggled his way free of Aurion's hold.

He couldn't help it. He just needed the corporeal reassurance that he wasn't going to wake up to find his new-found family gone when he awoke each morning. His first family hadn't worked-out. Gemma (and potentially, Jorge) had been killed in the blast, thereby breaking his second family up involuntarily. Chase wouldn't lose his third attempt at a family, too. He lived for the pack, and would die defending it.

When Aurion began to rise as well, he offered a swim, and the child lifted his gaze again, a small smile touching his expression before turning into a grin. Swims with Aurion were fun, it was far better than being sent off to be alone with your thoughts.

"Yeah," Chase agreed faintly, his sentiment halting there. He scrambled eagerly to his feet, but didn't bolt for the door-- he waited for Aurion to rise as well.

Chase skipped closer as Aurion retrieved a very familiar bag. It was a leather tote, containing what others would deem as junk. Aurion retrieved his trinket, a large, heavy green stone, and Chase retrieved his—a Hot Wheels car with most of its red paint still on it. Aurion arranged their pile of rocks that denoted that they’d left voluntarily, and safely, and then the two of them set their trinkets down for the others to see. All was well, and there wouldn’t be any reason for the pack-mates to fret.

Chase jogged after Aurion, following him outside, still donning his unshifted form.

>> “Keep up.”

That was all the caution that Chase received before Aurion bolted. Oh no! Chase broke into a run, human at first, before he began to shift. Tendrils expanded and reached outward, twining into a very familiar shape. His stature increased exponentially, as did Chases’ hands and arms. The musculature shifted, calling for a clumsy, four-legged gallop. The creature paused, glancing over its should to watch as a tail sprouted behind him-- excellent. Now it would be easier to run. Following Aurion, his duplicate pursued him, bolting full-speed in an attempt to catch up.

At first, becoming Aurion had been difficult—Chase had still needed the items, for longer than usual just so that he could get a sense of changing into such a peculiar shape. Yes, Aurion was still human, however inhuman he looked, so Chase could emulate him. Chase devoured the road beneath him with long strides, his tail waving ever so slightly to help maintain a steady pace.

The Doppelganger bolted full-force after the original, anthropomorphic lizard, his lengthy stride consuming the ground beneath it. It was only a brief while before Chase once again-caught up with Aurion, or at least arrived directly behind him, a sharp-toothed grin touching his expression.

“I caught you!” the duplicate shouted proudly. In some ways, he was different—Chase’s version of Aurion was always clean-shaven, and slightly more compact. Everything else, however, was exactly the same. The two were indiscernible, even to their own pack-mates. Chase had spoken too soon. The real Aurion charged forward, only speaking-up to instruct him. Chase kept pace with him well enough, never coming any closer than the tail of the other lizard-man. He’d improved with leaps and bowns, as compared to how skilled Chase had once been in Aurion’s form. He’d hardly been able to walk, much less run or swim.

They went past the settlement, which the second lizard-man regarded with apprehension. He trusted none of the other groups at all, didn’t know what sort of gestures to make, or how to address them to show that they were friendlies. They then veered towards the waterfront, towards the docks, and he shouted back at his twin. Aurion dove into the water first, giving a shout back at his doppelganger before vanishing beneath the surface. Aurion’s doppelganger sprinted after, diving after him through the hole that he had cleared. He swam a few strokes, eyes shut, before recalling that Aurion could kind-of see underwater. Right. The doppelganger cut through the water, a closed-mouth grin touching its expression, and it paused to skim the murky water, looking around.

It was cool, dark, and silent. After bobbing around beneath the water, Chase resurfaced, turning his gaze towards the original Aurion and smiling in spite of himself. The water was like that. Though he and Aurion seemed twins, Chase had kept his own mind during the shift, which reflected in his facial expressions—they still bore the guileless openness of a child, while Aurion’s face was noticeably older. Sure, their faces were identical, but by expressions alone, one could tell who the imposter was—that, and the eyes that still seemed inclined to change colors.

Chase bobbed closer to Aurion, who casually floated by on his back.

>> “You okay?”

He didn’t look at his doppelganger, who then glanced away, towards the sky, feigning the same nonchalance.

“Yeah,” Aurion’s voice rumbled back, though it made itself known with the hesitance of a sputtering engine. Both of them knew that it was an outright lie. Chase wouldn’t be cuddling up to another mutant if he was “okay”. Chase wanted to say what bothered him—that he kept having nightmares of… that day… but it was hard to say those kinds of things. It was easier to not say them. So, Chase didn’t. Or when he did, the words came out so haltingly, one could have mistaken him as the original Aurion from many years prior.

“Keep having nightmares,” Aurion’s doppelganger murmured. It’s voice was tight, trying to keep a quiver out of its tone. Ultimately, it made it sound tougher. At least, Chase hoped so, “I miss my mom and dad.”

However fragmented the explanation was, Chase hoped that it got what he was saying across. Beyond the fear that he had insinuated in his brief speech, there was so much more—the bombing had filled him with fear, and he now cleaved onto his makeshift family.

The doppelganger bobbed his head as the original Aurion pressed for details, swimming in-place with a similar method of treading water.

"Pretty much," the Doppelganger grunted, its tone halting and embarrassed. Boys were supposed to be the tough ones. Boys were supposed to be strong. Chase wasn't supposed to have these nightmares, live in fear. He should have been able to get over it. Chase tipped his head back in the water, feeling the icy chill press against his tensed muscles. There was obviously more than what Chase was alluding to, but he didn't want to complain. Besides which, what went on in his head was his business, not Aurion's.

His tone wasn't a conversational one, but rather one of preteen angstiness and frustration. Aurion couldn't understand, couldn't possibly grasp what Chase felt. Aurion was tough, and capable of being frightening. He wasn't weak, like Chase was. It was one of the reasons that the shapeshifter had taken such care to learn the other mutant's form, memorize it with the fibers that composed his flesh-- when Chase was masquerading as Aurion, he felt invincible. He felt safe. Being himself, Chase felt the same as ever. Small and frightened. Very unmanly.

>> "You wanna talk about it? About them?"

The doppelganger glanced towards Aurion, closing both of its eyelids as if to go to sleep, but with noticeably more tension in its features. Chase bobbed underwater for a moment, rubbing at his eyes. No. I never want to talk about it.

After a few moments, he bobbed back up, pouting his lips out as if he were about to sulk. He didn't look like someone who was about to speak.

"They just... died," Chase mumbled, "The day that the bomb hit. And my brain won't let me forget them. I keep having flashbacks-- well, sometimes. Othertimes my dreams are freaking weird, but they're always about Mom and Dad. I was there when Mom died... and... I dunno about Dad... but if he was alive, he would've come lookin' for me."

And he hadn't. The doppelgangers' expression tightened again, and he bobbed back underwater, for moment, and when he resurfaced, he was glaring at the water just in front of him. His expression had puckered into a frown. The explanation had sounded tough enough. But, his lip was quivering, and his jaw was clenched about whatever was welled-up in his chest and threatening to explode at the first deep breath.

"Don't tell Guglin," Chase grumbled, sucking air through his teeth and mopping at the borrowed eyes, "I'll never hear the end of it."

The back of his hand came away with red-tinted tears. That's right, Aurion cried blood. The pre-teen grumbled quietly and cupped more water into his immense hand, pouring it slowly over his eyes. He'd better get the crying out of his system while they were still in the water, or else everyone would know.

Chase gave a one-shouldered shrug, and answered with a dismissive, “Just gets weird. Like dreams do.”

Chase shook his head, slowly, as Aurion asked if Chase had ever tried looking for Jorge. It was a partial lie. He had looked, sort-of, but after three years, it was easy to give up. Some days, when Chase was feeling particularly optimistic, he would go looking for his father, but these days grew fewer and farther between, as time wore on.

“M-maybe,” Chase replied, a hesitant smile tilting on the lips of Aurion’s doppelganger, as he openly attempted to mop his tears up again. Aurion squeezed Chase’s shoulder reassuringly, murmuring about the repercussions of letting Guglin know that such a thing had happened—he’d talk about it for weeks, and they’d have to knock him unconscious to get some peace and quiet. Chase grinned, a touch sadly, and as Aurion touched his chin, Chase lowered his gaze.

Aurion’s attempt at cheering the adolescent up worked. Chase chuckled, dipping his head.

“But we love him,” Chase protested, still smiling. Even if the little goblin could be a touch annoying, he was still a pack mate.

Chase grinned. No one would admit it to Guglin’s face, for the little humanoid would wield this as a defense every time he grated on someones’ nerves. One of those, “You wouldn’t hit me, you love me… right?’ scenarios, that the ferals couldn’t afford to give him.

As Aurion proposed that they go fishing, Chase nodded his head enthusiastically. He loved fish—liked it far more than when their meals took their inspiration from the Donner Party, that was for sure. It was one of the reasons that Chase was as thin as he was. He didn’t eat people, when they were offered. He held-out for other sustenance, despite the insistence of the others.

“Fishing sounds good,” the adolescent grunted, swimming after the reptilian man, “Should try to find something for Sledge, too.”

Chase was well-aware of the dietary needs of the most human of the group—he couldn’t eat certain kinds of fish, but what kinds, the adolescent didn’t know. Either way, it wasn’t a risk that the child wanted to take.