Hey, Who's Talking? (Riley)

Riley was a closet romantic. It was evident by the tote full of romance novels stuffed under her bed. She pulled them out all the time, reading her favorite parts over and over again. It wasn’t about the smut. Not at all. It was the ewey gooey gushy love parts that made her warm from her head to her toes. Not that she’d have ever admitted it. Hell no. As much as she loved the stories, they were simply that. Stories.

Nobody fell in love and lived happily ever after. The knight in shining armor didn’t exist, and if he did he was off rescuing pretty blonds with large allowances from the tall towers. Not the scowling brunettes from the back alleys and sleazy photographers, or sleazy lawyers and their infuriating coffee boys.

Better to leave it to Bogart.

Riley loved places like this. Old theaters that were obviously past their prime, relegated to showing classics for cult audiences and homeless people who could scrape together enough money to come in out of the cold for the two and a half hours the movie ran.

There weren’t very many people in the theater, and Riley had seen the movie a hundred times. She had it on DVD…but there was something about watching it in a theater that was so appealing. Maybe it was that Bogart was so much larger than life up there on the screen. Riley watched, and munched popcorn from the small bag she’d purchased on her way in. She hadn’t taken her hood down inside the theater, just in case there was anyone acquainted with her in the theater.

She turned her head slightly, noticing that she wasn’t alone in her row. It was dark, and all she could see was a silhouette. Had this person seen the movie as often as she had? The dark anonymity of the theater made Riley slightly more bold and friendly than she usually was and she rose from her seat, moving until there were only two seats between them.

”First time?” she asked in a whisper just loud enough to carry across the space.

Ah, he wasn’t a first-timer. Riley squinted her eyes slightly, trying to get a better picture of the stranger a few seats away. All she could make out was a sillouette, but he seemed friendly enough and the movie had put her in a good mood. A flash of teeth showed in the light from the projector, and Riley smiled back from the recesses of her hood.

Did she come here often?

”Often enough.” she replied, taking another handful of popcorn and working on it one piece at a time, she’d dumped a package of M&M’s inside and smiled at the salty constrast of the chocolate against the sweet.

Her new friend was into the old movies, it appeared, but slightly different genres than Riley frequented, ”I think that we’re on slightly different ends of the interest spectrum, but were lucky enough to overlap here. I’m guessing it’s the manly Bogart finess and Nazi drama that have you here.”

She paused. Dare she reveal her dark secret? Well, it was dark, and she was hidden by her hood. ”I saw Sabrina last week, and they played Breakfast at Tiffany’s two weeks before. An Affair to Remember last month. Somehow I doubt you were there.”

Riley had to wrinkle her nose as the phrase, “hopeless romantic”. That’s not what this was about. This was all about the fantasy. A “hopeless romantic” was the type of person who believed that there were real men out there who could live up to the standards set by the movies. The type of person who looked for that kind of guy in everyone they met.

Riley looked across the two empty seats at the silhouetted stranger. ”I’m not a hopeless romantic.” she said firmly but not meanly.

”I just like the acting in the old movies. It’s so much more earnest. Things were simpler then. There just weren’t as many variables. You know? Men were men. Women were impressed.”

”Mm hmmm.” Riley said, shrugging her shoulders when he admitted to over dissecting things. If she’d been the contrite type, she may have even admitted that she was over-sensitive. Good thing she wasn’t, though, that probably would have been awkward.

She forgave him his indiscretion. This time. Besides, the conversation was going too well to simply discard it because of a such a small faux pas. Riley ate more popcorn, chocolate met salt. Mmmmm.

He brought up Nick Cage, and Riley nearly choked. If he’d been able to see her face in the dark recesses of the hood her expression would have revealed her true feelings on that particular actor.

”Yeah, I’m not a fan of big explosions and terrible acting that tries to take itself too seriously.”

She thought for a few moments, ”At least he’s not Keaneu Reeves.” She said, preparing to lapse back into silence and simply watch the film. There was something about the stranger’s last statement that had tickled her fancy though.

”So tell me, how is a man a man as opposed to an actor? If Bogart wasn’t so good…it could be said that he plays the same character in every film.”

Riley nodded in the dark, wondering if her movie buddy would even see the movement in the dark. She grinned at his Keanu impression, it really was spot-on. Not many people could do that without sounding cheesy. This guy was obviously a master of conversation. That meant he was also a master of BS. Riley took note and continued having fun.

”I think there’s a difference between being a character actor, and being so crappy that you can only be cast in a single role.” Riley said. John Wayne was epic, there was no two ways about it, ”Sure, John Wayne played a cowboy in most of his movies…but he was a different cowboy in them all.” Yes. Riley watched AMC on the weekends. They liked their John Wayne.

He brought up Con Air, and Riley had to snort, loud enough that someone several rows forward turned and gave a dirty look. Riley chuckled and shook her head, ”There’s something to be said about movies like that though. The sheer entertainment value of something that bad can’t be dismissed. If we’re talking about shitty Nicholas Cage movies though…I’d have to go with ‘The Rock’ you get the Connery/Cage double-whammy in that one.”

”Exactly.” Riley said, agreeing with her movie-going cohort as Casablanca progressed along its natural and inevitable course. Eventually, the movie would end in tears…at least for the people on screen. Man, the audience was riveted. That’s not why Riley was there though. The movies were great, sure, but she was here for the camaraderie. This was the first time she’d actually spoken to anyone though. The experience was speaking in favor of doing the same in the future.

He asked if she wanted to know a secret, and Riley nodded her head, not thinking about the fact that it was really dark and he probably couldn’t see her. It didn’t matter, he told her anyway and Riley shrugged her shoulders.

”Anyone who can’t admit that they watch, and sometimes love B-movies is a liar. Plain and simple. It all harkens back to my earlier point. Sometimes you watch a movie for the deep emotional value and epic’ness…like this.” she said, pointing to the screen. Bogart was laying it on thick. ”Sometimes you watch for sheer entertainment value.” she paused and thought for a moment.

”It’s like people who walk into comic book movies and expect cinematic masterpieces. It’s a comic book movie for crying out loud. They’re campy as hell in their original incarnations. I don’t know why people can’t just see the thing for what it is instead of trying to make it into something more.”

Riley paused. She was ranting to a complete stranger in the middle of a movie theater.

”You know what I mean, right?”

Riley sighed with relief when he got her point. So many people were confused by the idea she suggested about movies. Granted, she was rarely in the mood to talk about things like this, especially with almost completely random strangers, but people still didn’t get it most of the time. Call a spade a spade. He looked at her in the dark, and Riley looked back at the silhouette, she could almost make out his facial features in the flickering light of the movie. Almost, but not quite, she smiled back, sure he couldn’t see it in the recesses of her hood.
”Exactly.” she said when he’d finished speaking.”People also need to resign themselves to the fact that the movie will never be better than the book. They need to stop going in and nitpicking every tiny little thing because it simply won’t live up to their standards. It can’t.”

Riley paused again, not so concerned about ranting since her convo buddy seemed to be doing the same thing. People weren’t yelling and throwing Skittles yet either.

”People build these characters and these story lines up in their heads. Their brain creates the scenes every bit as perfect as they could be to that individual. Then they expect those expectations to be met. They expect to see their version of the perfect scene up on the screen.”

Riley’s tone suggested what she thought about those people, ”I’m a realist, at least I hope I am. It’s like you said…it’s entertainment. The thing is…you have to be willing to let yourself enjoy it.”