Eisen’s tears flowed, and he sobbed so poorly, the past seven months of transition collapsed on him on top of the rush of emotions he’d just felt. His vision blurred and all he could think about was just letting it out; deep sobs, no yelling, just a slow and steady squeeze.

After what seemed like forever, Eisen looked up at an employee mopping the floor in front of him and a worried yet frazzled woman pulled him up to his feet and ushered him to the bathroom. Snot ran down his nose as she half-guided, half-shoved him to the bathroom where she then began to yell at him to take off his shirt. It was then that Eisen saw himself in the mirror, his long disheveled hair and neon-fit all soaked in a light brown. He felt the  burn on his chest and his hands, and suddenly the woman was placing a bottle of aloe in front of his face and yelling at him to apply it.

Eisen’s vision snapped together and he felt the searing burn on his hands the most, and the softer burn on his chest and thighs. Yet, all he could think about in this moment was one person; whose gaze had pierced him -just earlier today.

Quin.

His face turned a deeper shade of red than his burns. Where did she go? Fuck me. No no no no… She probably ran away. She probably wanted nothing to do with the sorry mess that he was, with this angry Asian lady now yelling at him, and the stupid idiot he was who couldn’t keep it together. But if it hadn’t been for her, he could’ve been a zombie. No, he could’ve been a failure, running out of that barcade’s chaos like a loser, an imposter, anything other than a hero. But he so desperately wanted to be something else for the night. And right now, he didn’t care to be a hero. He didn’t care if he was still an imposter, a loser, a nobody. He just wanted to show Quin, he was better. Better than this.

Eisen pushed past the Asian lady yelling at him, and ran back out to where they were cleaning his hot-mess. The owner began yelling at him too and so many of the tea-drinkers in the shop stared in shock.  But Eisen didn’t care— he needed to find Quin.

She couldn’t have gone far, could she? Images flashed in his mind of her plastic shoes, the strength of her wrapping those tiles around those zombies, the fact she was literally about to pour him some tea. He couldn’t have lost her already?

Just down the street, in a black outfit, hunched over on the sidewalk. There she was. 

Eisen walked towards her, his palms starting to burn even more now, but he was at a loss at what to say. Sorry? Thank you? Bless you? Eisen froze. Sometimes it felt like that was the only thing he knew how to do— freeze. Both himself and others. He stared at her, just weeping, at this distance and the gusto he had held within him just a moment a go, started to dissipate again.

He couldn’t even fess up to her. Maybe he was just an idiot. 

As he was about to hang his head low and walked away, the image of his empty room hit him again. He didn’t want to go home. Not now. Not alone. So he clenched his burned fists and decided enough was enough. No more running. 

Eisen picked up his head and walked slowly to where Quin was, not wanting to scare her, and picked a spot on the sidewalk to her right. He knew it was impolite to watch someone cry, but he didn’t know what else to do. So he sat, arms crossed over his knees, mirroring her, and watched her cry in the streetlight.

“Hey. It’s been a shitty night… and I’ve been an even shittier person. But you… back there… tonight you were my hero.”

Once she had started to cry, it had been really hard to stop, and Quin had known she was alone on her little curb. It was supposedly a rare thing to really feel alone in New York, but Quin always seemed to end up this way.

So she sat there on the curb with her head cradled on her arms and thought about everything that had happened that night. It had all been so horrible and what she’d done to those people…

Quin didn’t know how long she’d sat there, but eventually she got the feeling that maybe she wasn’t so alone anymore. Still, it was hard to turn her head and look, even when she heard the somewhat familiar voice.

Now Eisen was doing better. Funny, because now Quin was falling apart.

Dropping her arms down to wrap around her legs, Quin rested her head on her knees and looked over at Eisen in the streetlight.

”I’ve never hurt anyone before.” she said, sniffing a little, certain her nose was bright red from crying. She’d heard stories about her older self, but this had definitely been a first.

Eisen definitely looked better than he had a while ago in the tea shop, but he’d definitely been through it. Quin knew how hot that tea had been, and she couldn’t see well in the light from the street lamp, but it had to have hurt.

”I’m sorry.” she said. ”I didn’t know where else to go and when I was little my Mom always said that tea fixes everything.”

Something about the stench of the New York sidewalk, the lights that shone from shop fronts in the distance and the silent bustle of the city made watching someone crying in the middle of it a little more unnerving than anywhere else. Eisen didn’t know if he should reach out and place a hand on her shoulder, or if staring was good enough. His silence only gave way to the city playing its soundtrack louder.

Yet, he bent over and did his utmost best to catch every syllable that fell from Quin’s mouth.

”I’ve never hurt anyone before.” she said, sniffling. 

Eisen couldn’t relate. The list of people he’d hurt both physically and emotionally, intentionally and unintentionally he didn’t want to think about that right now. But Quin wasn’t him, and this moment wasn’t about him either Eisen knew if he said anything, he’d probably mess it up. So he shut his mouth and let her keep speaking.

”I’m sorry.” she said.  ”I didn’t know where else to go and when I was little my Mom always said that tea fixes everything.”

Eisen brought his burned palms to his face. Now he wished he had accepted that aloe from the lady yelling at him. His chest too, continued to sizzle. Thinking about the hot-tea; it all had happened so fast he was in disbelief that he’d had all those emotions surging through him. For the moment at least, it all faded to the background. Quin took precedence right now.

“No cure-all exists in this world, but it was a really nice gesture… I’m the one who should be sorry.” He held his two hands up to the street light. He had been burned before, when he grabbed a live wire during his days as a telephone wire mechanic. And out of everything tonight, this was the least inconvenient thing.

“Are you hurt?” He asked her, gaze and tone softened. He really wanted to make good this time around, his voice began to tremble. “I’m glad you made it out with me.”

She didn’t feel so much like crying now, but her body felt drained and weary. Quin wondered if it was the buzz from the alcohol she’d had earlier wearing off, the adrenaline from the fight, or how much she had used her powers.

Eisen pointed out that there was no cure in the world for what had just happened and he sounded like he knew well enough that Quin took it to heart, he was also sorry and Quin nodded in acceptance.

Up he held his hands, and Quin winced as she realized she’d been right about the tea. Eisen’s hands were clearly burned and she scowled slightly at the sight.

He asked if she was hurt and said he was glad they’d made it out and Quin sat up slowly, shaking her head as she lifted her hand to tug her ponytail holder free and let her hair loose so it would stop tugging on her sore scalp, ”Not really, but you’ve definitely seen better days.” she said, giving Eisen an appraising look before standing up.

”Come on. I’ve got some aloe at home, and it’s nearby. My friends and I walked to the bar. “ . Speaking of which, Quin’s group text was firing off with texts from her fellow Havenites. So far it looked like everyone had made it out. Glancing up from the phone, she gave Eisen a grim smile.

”And by home I mean my apartment in a highly secure building with 24 hour security so if you’re some kind of serial killer…reign it in for a night because I’m not in the mood.” she said, and started walking.

At the mention of her apartment, Eisen’s heart sped up. Was it out of excitement? Nervousness? Anticipation? Despite the recent events of the night, Eisen’s body prepared itself as it always did for when he followed someone home or ended up taking someone else home for the night. He swallowed, trying to tell himself that this was nothing more than a kind gesture from a stranger.

Eisen picked himself off the ground without the use of his hands and followed after Quin.

“And by home I mean my apartment in a highly secure building with 24 hour security so if you’re some kind of serial killer…reign it in for a night because I’m not in the mood.” Quin’s biting remark seemed out of character, but then again, they were both thoroughly warped from the night’s events.

Eisen cleared his voice to speak, but nothing emerged. He too began to feel the exhaustion seep into his bones, for it felt like the first time that night that any part of his body released the tension that had been held captive. He desired to check his phone, see the time and if anyone had cared to reach out to him, but trying to slip his hand into his pocket at the moment proved difficult. 

“Where exactly do you live?” He asked, mostly out of curiosity. It was then that he began to realize, he didn’t know her at all. By the way she moved, by the way she spoke and carried herself, Quin didn’t give off the vibe that she was anyone important. But by her confidence, he could have been fooled as well. For one younger than him, she did move pretty swiftly and kept herself in check with the zombies. Who exactly was this woman who offered him aloe? He followed her lead.

”Have you heard of Haven?” Quin asked as they started walking. Most people had. The organization was well known in the city for their outreach and community work.

Why had she asked Eisen to come back to her place? Barely was even an exaggeration for how well Quin knew the man walking with her, and he’d already kind of fallen apart twice.

He hadn’t left her though.

Even though he knew her as little as she knew him, he hadn’t left her at the club, and he had come to find her after she’d left him in the shop. That counted for something, right?

They walked in silence for a while and eventually made it to Haven Headquarters. The building was impressive as it had always been and Quin couldn’t help but be a little bit curious to see Eisen’s reaction as she took him through the double doors, past the concierge, and to the elevators and their fingerprint scanners that would grant access to the upper residential floors of the building.

”It’s a long story…” she said by way of explanation as the elevator doors opened and Quin walked inside.

Eisen followed Quin blindly through the streets, his mind set on staving off the pain and pushing his legs forward. He began to second-guess his desire to follow Quin home, for despite the insecurities surrounding his king-sized bed, he so wanted to be in it right now. To let the remedial blanket of sleep cover him.

As soon as he laid eyes on Haven’s Headquarters, however, all of that weariness faded. Eisen had a little more pep to his step, and curiosity covered his soles as the towering building only grew bigger and bigger as they came closer. This was where she lived? Suddenly Eisen didn’t feel appropriately dressed for the situation, with his tea-splattered white clothes and his neon yellow. He imagined the cameras jamming up as he walked into the perfectly set foyer, the chandeliers with glass that could cut you, the visible shine-streak on all the polished surfaces, and people in uniforms stationed at random parts like NPC’s in a video game. 

Eisen did his best to keep his jaw locked in place, but as soon as they arrived to the fingerprint scanners at the elevators, Eisen almost lost his shit. He climbed in on after Quin, suddenly feeling like he didn’t belong. All the underground history in his background, with the mutant underground, his time as a mercenary, and other little things that might have broken the law or landed him in jail, didn’t flash through his mind. What he was most worried about was if they could smell he wasn’t made of money. 

In his nervousness, as Quin pressed a floor, Eisen’s mutation trigged through his nervous feet, and his lock took hold of the elevator, such that as they waited in silence, the seconds turned into minutes and the elevator still hadn’t moved. He was so tense, that even the push of the elevator’s machinery wasn’t enough to break Eisen’s spatial lock.

”We’re stuck? That’s crazy.” He began to sweat bullets, then finally let his mutation go. And the elevator went up a floor at a time. Ding. Ding. Ding. Ding.

Then as they arrived on the floor, Eisen’s mutation struck again, keeping the elevator doors closed. The door open signed showed up and yet the doors refused to budge. He looked around, staring at the walls. And began to whistle. “For such a fancy place, this elevator sure doesn’t want to work.” 

The elevator was having problems.

That was odd. The elevators never had problems. In fact, it seemed like nothing ever had problems in the Headquarters.

Still, the elevator stopped moving, the machinery making slightly strained noises and Quin couldn’t help the tendril of alarm that worked its way through her as Eisen pointed out that they were stuck.

It only lasted a couple minutes though, and the elevator lurched back into the motion and the redhead breathed a deep sigh of relief…until they got to her floor and the doors didn’t open.

And didn’t open.

And then Eisen started whistling, and spoke, ”Is all of this you?” Quin asked, remembering how he’d stopped the clowns in their tracks at the bar. Rolling her eyes and laughing as the tension broke a bit, Quin shook her head and said, ”You’d think you’d want that aloe more than you’d want to stand in an elevator.”

“Well you didn’t tell me you lived in a fucking high-rise mansion…” Eisen blushed as he released his mutation on the doors and they opened as normal. Sliding ever much faster than he wanted them to. 

“I hope you don’t mind me asking…” Eisen wanted to scratch the back of his head, but his hands were still too much in pain, so he used the back of his palms instead. He was usually a go with the flow kind-of guy, but a lot of this went over his head.

”Do y’all have those things in your toilets that wash your butthole?” He followed Quin out of the elevator and stepped on the nice lush carpeting. He just wanted to take off his shoes and feel the floor. If this was just the hallway, he could only imagine what the rooms were like. 

“Not that I need to use it right now, I mean. I was just…” He let himself trail off as he realized how dumb he must have sounded. Never in his life did he really seek luxury, it was kinda drilled into him at a young age that this world wasn’t for him. Now that he was here for a just a second, he realized just how low he’d been aiming for all his life. And he thought back to the days when he’d look into buildings like this from afar, not even daring to come close. Finding the run-down district walls to plaster his graffiti on— at least there he felt he could make a difference.

”When was I supposed to tell you? During the dance extravaganza or in the middle of the clowns?” Quin said, exiting the elevator as the doors finally opened.

Out into the hall they walked and Quin had to admit that this was probably a lot. She was about to say something to explain when Eisen asked if she had a…what?

”You mean a bidet?” she said, bursting out laughing on the last word.

”No, no I don’t…it’s just an apartment.” she said as they came up to the door and she used the same kind of fingerprint scanner that was on the elevator to open her door. ”Convenient for nights out on the town.” she said as she pushed the door open.

“Just” an apartment was probably underselling the place a bit, Quin decided. She’d seen the apartment she’d lived in before and it really couldn’t compare.

Her current place was furnished with things that had obviously been placed there by a staging company and it was messier than a person probably would have thought a place like this should be.

Law books and printed journal articles were spread over the kitchen table where a laptop sat open facing away from the door. The L-shaped couch was nearby, several cozy looking throws draped over it where it faced the wall mounted TV.

The most striking feature though, was the full wall of windows that overlooked Central Park. Surely that view had been a gift from whoever had set her up with this apartment.

”Grab a seat at the breakfast bar or on the couch, I’ve got a first aid kit here somewhere…” Quin said, moving down the short hallway that branched off the living space, presumably to the bedroom and bathroom.

“Oh so. You don’t have a—-  bidet?” Eisen’s eyes bugged out when there was another fingerprint lock that was needed to enter another part of the building. He wondered if they had those fancy dimming lights in the commercials that were voice operated, or those disc vacuums that zoom across the floor and clean up for you.

Once he stepped in after Quin, Eisen’s gaze glued to the picturesque little apartment — huge to him though. The wide mounted TV and squeaky looking yet comfy at the same time furniture- Eisen had only hoped to live in something this chiq when he walked through the furniture stores in the shopping district. The view to Central Park was pretty nice too, seeing the city and its night lights speckled across the wide park in the distance. Even the books and laptop made Eisen a little envious— he never had any of this. Just his king bed, the beds of strangers, and the couches he hopped back and forth on when he didn’t want to commit to a bed for a while.

Speaking of couches, Eisen scooted closer to the L-shaped one in the middle of the living room and when Quin offered it to him, he looked at her and back to the couch. He then placed the back of his burned hand against the smooth and flouncy surface of the couch, and it called so much to him. Every exhausted cell in his body wanted to melt right into, and as soon as Quin stepped out to another room for the first aid kit, Eisen rested his weight on the couch, starting with his ass.

Soon his back, his legs his arms and his head made it on top of the smooth, and firm surface. Even the flurry of memories from their night, the barcade lights, the zombie goo, the tea shop, all of it soon turned from color to grey and then to black as he laid his head down. Tea-stained clothes, sweat doused neon, burn marks, drool and all on his new dream couch. The last thing on his mind was to yell:

”Hey apartment, dim the lights.” Without any change to the lighting, Eisen entered into Slumberland (TM).

It only took Quin a few moments of rummaging around in her bathroom linen closet to come up with the first aid kit and some 100% aloe (the blue kind with lidocaine) that she’d gotten the summer before when she’d forgotten she was a redhead and had nearly given herself a second a degree sunburn on a particularly hot summer day.

Making her way back out to the living room, she said ”It’s probably going to hurt like he-…” stopping when she realized that Eisen was fast asleep on her couch.

Well shit.

Now that he was sleep, Quin took just a moment to study the man sleeping on her couch. This was not at all how the night was supposed to have gone, she decided as she set the first aid kit and aloe down on the coffee table in case he woke up in the night and wanted it.

Realizing she too was exhausted, Quin stood for a moment more contemplating the wisdom in weakening Eisen up before she simply moved over the the couch, snagged one of the blankets, and draped it over him. It got chilly in the living room sometimes because of the windows…

Then it was off to the bathroom to remove all the makeup and brush out her tangled and slightly matted hair before Quin went into her own room. Once there, she peeked out again to assure herself that Eisen was still there before she quietly shut the door and locked it…just in case. From there, it was a quick hop into a tank top and pajama pants and Quin was snuggling down into her bed.

She’d deal with everything else in the morning.

Eisen loved the dark and sweet caress of sleep — but he hated the screams that invaded his nightmares. The flashing barcade lights took residence in his nightly journeys, and at one point he had leaped on the partygoers that had hid behind the arcade machines and asked for his help; taking their faces into his hands and dripping his eye goo into their open mouths still screaming for assistance.

Eisen sat up from his new couch bed and gripped the blanket he now had on him, his palms pulsing with a faint pain. The apartment had been dimmed with the exception of the kitchen lights, and Eisen had yet to see the streaks of dawn pierce Quin’s apartment windows. He’d almost forgotten where he was, but the soreness that still invaded his every bone struck a sweet reminder of his experience the night before. That and the nightmares hadn’t yet faded.

He sat alone in the darkness of the room, empty of every other thought than the fact that he was alone. He got up off the couch and wandered past the aloe bottle. He floated across the soft carpeting and to the view of Central Park. A view the spread towards the city where so many things happened in such closed quarters at times… he could leave if he wanted. He could drift across the space between the towering buildings and return to his neck of the woods, where he would be alone with his thoughts.

Just to be someone else for the night That was what he’d try to do last night, and as he held his hand on the glass of the balcony doors, like a monkey trapped in an exhibit, he exhaled and collapsed on the floor. He was no superhero. He was no villain either. He could claim neither title with any confidence, only racking himself with doubt along every crease his thoughts travelled down.

But he couldn’t escape being himself either. And he couldn’t always wait for something or someone else to come along and cheer him on, or force his hand, or give him an embrace. So, Eisen wandered to the kitchen and raided the pantries for anything he could scrounge together to make Quin a thank-you breakfast casserole. He just hoped her as a student would have more than ramen in her cabinets.

It was hard to sleep when you were trying to figure out if you’d killed a man that night.

It was even harder to sleep when you were pretty sure the answer was yes and the mountain of law books on the dining room table would inform you that leaving the scene of said action had been about the dumbest thing you could possibly have done.

If you weren’t guilty. If it was self defense. Why did you run?

There was also an almost complete stranger currently sleeping on her couch. A complete stranger who had stuck with her through the whole ordeal, however messy it had all been.

Tossing and turning only lasted for so long though, and eventually the exhaustion and adrenaline drop from the night had pulled her into a light and somewhat fitful sleep.

The dreams weren’t great either. They happened a lot, glimpses of things from her subconscious that she could almost hold on to but could never seem to grasp. How many times had she woke up crying over something she couldn’t even remember? Now there were images of clowns and their thralls that were far more vivid that anything she couldn’t remember.

All in all, it had been a really shitty night and Quin woke up far earlier than she should have with a headache and to the smell of something cooking.

Up she got, a quizzical little frown on her face as she unlocked the door and padded on bare feet out into the living room and then the kitchen.

It was still a little dark outside and Eisen was in her kitchen and had been cooking. It didn’t look like he was a serial killer, but maybe he was a cereal killer. Heh.

”You have trouble staying asleep too?” Quin asked, yawning slightly as she crossed the space to lean against the breakfast bar. ”It smells good.”

Eisen was surprised by the presence of veritable vegetables and variety of foodstuffs. He himself wasn’t a chef of any renown, but once he found the pots, pans, and baking supplies he began to rock and roll. He found potatoes, and took a couple to dicing, searing them in the pan until they were just a little brown on all sides. He diced them small, and set that aside before prepping an egg mixture with the whole milk that was surprisingly still full. Yes, was it still hard to hold things? Sure, but the pain helped to numb his mind as well. 

He then floated to a chopping board and sautéed a simple mix of onion, garlic, and bell peppers. Spinach and kale were next, and once the greens wilted in the pan, it was time to layer the casserole dish. He started the bottom layer with some pepper jack cheese he found, added the potatoes, the veggies, then sealed all the ingredients with the egg mixture. Of course, he’d remembered to warm up the oven such that it was hot enough to slide the casserole inside.

Quick, simple and done in over a half-hour. He thought having it done earlier before Quin awoke, and so he could’ve kept the dish warm in the oven, in case she decided to sleep in.

As he waited for the casserole to bake, he noticed his clothes still a nasty brown having been soaked with tea. The herbs weren’t clear for sure, and since the apartment was still quiet. He decided to give his clothes a quick rinse in the sink. Peeling off his shirt, he rinsed it off in the kitchen sink and wrung it over the dirty dishes right before he heard Quin’s voice. He wrinkled his face as it still hurt to use his palms, but he leaned into the pain.

>> ”It smells good” Her voice echoed through the quiet kitchen, and Eisen leaned over to see her curiously peeking in. He wrung out as much of the tea water he could, before he turned with his tattooed torso towards her, holding out his wrinkly shirt.

”Mornin’. Care if I borrow your dryer? Hope you don’t mind me making breakfast.” He gave a toothy grin, realizing again in the light of the kitchen, how tall and slender Quin was, and how her bed head gave her soft features an endearing frame.